Welcome to 10 Years of Blog Posts

 Yes, it's been 10 long years since I started this blog. I think my first one was published on (or around) the 4th of August, 2013.

In those years I've lived in three different states, changed jobs four times, had one serious relationship and breakup, made a lot of friends, published poems and short stories, got a cat, and done a bunch of other things that I don't feel like listing out.

A lot has changed, though that doesn't mean I've progressed towards anything.

My earliest blog posts (on this site at least) were under an email addressed affiliated with my undergrad university. That email address went away earlier this month and with it, all the pictures linked into those early posts. I could go back and "fix" this, but part of me wants to keep moving forward and not look back at those old posts. 

I first started writing this blog because the adult world felt like Wonderland - nonsensical and crazy. 

Occasionally, it still does. Though, I like to think that I've gotten the hang of a few things in the decade I've been posting about my life lessons, opinions, and musings. I may have started with the intention of providing advice and lists of things of "what not to do", but it has changed along with myself.

I like to think that I've changed for the better and will continue to do so. I'm fairly positive that I've grown as a person and that I will continue do so. Kind of like the song "For Good" from Wicked. This blog has seen me through a lot of things.

This is not a "goodbye" post. I'm not ready to stop posting - maybe not weekly, but close enough. Sometimes I think I'm a little too attached to this blog than I meant to be.

Fun fact, though the overall name of the blog is a nod to Lewis Carrol's Alice in Wonderland, the reason each post starts with "Welcome to..." is from the anime Welcome to the NHK. I saw this anime my final semester of university in a class on Japanese Manga, Anime, and Pop Culture. It was about three young adults trying to navigate the challenges of adulthood while dealing with mental health problems, societal demands, and change in general. It really stuck with me and I've used it for every post on this blog.

So, here's to the next ten years. 

Will I still be writing this blog then? I don't know (part of me hopes I've moved on to bigger and better things or finally ran out of thoughts to put on the Internet).

I do know that I won't be the same then as I am today.

And I'm sure you'll be different too.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y'all like getting updates from me.

Welcome to Changing Times and Literature

7/21/2021 - update. The most I think about this blogpost the more I am dissatisfied by it. I wrote this as more of me "thinking out loud" than trying to make an argument.  I'm not sure that the idea of updating books in the public domain to match modern language necessarily good or bad. I know I've struggled with books that were written 100 years ago because the language is very different from today. If they don't have updated language, then a guide and/or glossary should probably be included (it's the only way that I got through The Prince). If an author is still alive, a book should NOT be modified without their permission, but if they want to update their own books that's up to them (George Lucas has had varying success with the Star Wars movies).

I’ve started reading two books that were written in a very different time than the one that we are currently living in. One is an advice book on how to be an adult that was written in 2013. The other is about a dog parodying Proust’s writing style written in the 1990s (at least I think it was written in the 1990s because the language sometimes feels much older - like 1940s or 50s).

And I can’t help but noticing how dated their language is in places.

The 2010s was a rollercoaster ride for social movements and major events. And reading these books shows how much the United States (at least has changed). It’s not that these are bad books. It’s just that some of their humor and word choices have not aged well. The advice in the book from 2013, for example, is still fairly relevant to people moving away from home for the first time - just not all of it. And I can’t help but cringe at some of the humor. The dog book uses descriptions that may be accurate (like using the female word for a dog that is offensive to human ladies), but stick out like bad haircut in that one selfie you can’t escape. 

I almost wish I could read these books with 2021 language. 

That’s not to say that all books written in the past need to have their language updates. I’ve read plenty of books (even from a hundred plus years ago) that had language that was clearly from the era it was written in. If their language was updated to 2021 standards, it would probably take me out of the story.

However, that doesn’t mean that some language, especially language which is found to be very offensive, shouldn’t be updated. A few years ago, I remember hearing about a controversy about updating Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn to include less offensive language. Though it’s true that Mark Twain wrote that book to mimic the way people spoke (at that time in Missouri), I could barely read it and stopped less than half way through.  Between the offensive language and off syntax, I lost interest in one of “the American Classics”.

There are some publishers who have gone a head and updated their books as times have changed. Most notably are the girl detective series Nancy Drew. 

This is the version of the book I am most familiar with.

I grew up reading the Nancy Drew books. In fact, they were what motivated me to improve my reading I the first place. However, the books I read in the late 90s and early 2000s had been revised significantly from their original publication in the 1930s. 

The first major revisions began in the 50s, 60s, and 70s. Many of the plots were updated to be less violent, sexist, and even racist (dang! Nancy, not you too!). Modernization has continued, though nothing as dramatic from the first major revisions. Thankfully, modernization hasn't gone too far. Nancy’s original stories mostly take place in a timeless spot somewhere between the American 30s and 60s. I don’t think I would have enjoyed too much modernization in the original novels. 

I don’t know if this is the latest version of the cover or not but it embraces the 30s/40s

However, like Scooby Doo, the Nancy Drew books get a facelift ever decade or so. And I really can’t complain because these are mostly marketed as new stories. I remember the first I’ve I picked up a Nancy Drew book and she was solving a murder in Paris.  To my young mind, Nancy Drew didn’t solve murders - that was Poirot or Ms. Marples. She also didn’t have a cell phone or laptop.

The Nancy Drew games have done a fantastic job keeping up with modernization and even remastering and updating the older games. It doesn’t always work out perfectly, but I’ve been impressed with he effort the Nancy Drew game developers have done to keep the famous girl detective relevant to new audiences.

 Modernization can be hit and miss. Some books pull off timeless story telling. Some books and stories are clearly products of their time. However, if we want to keep certain classics in the public eye, we’ve gotta get rid of the offensive language or be very careful how we teach the material. Certain references and jokes may age poorly, some may become the signifier of a generation.

After all we still read and preform Shakespeare (though my 12th grade class had a lot of trouble with Hamlet before our teacher found a recorded copy for us to listen to).

What are y’all’s thoughts on modernizing literature. If it’s super popular should it be updated every decade or so to make sure language is understood and inoffensive? Should books be products of their time? Who has the final say?

And this just doesn’t apply to books. It can apply to video games (already mention), comics, movies, etc. I’m just using books in this post.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Welcome to the Fall of 2020

 Fall starts on Tuesday. That's the equinox. 

In my area, the weather is already cooling down and the air has that rich smoked meat and wood sent that I closely associate with home.

Last week, I was a little ticked off when I wrote my blog post. I still am. Thankfully, things are getting better in the Northwestern United States and my family is out of danger. As fire season dies down, we'll have to start preparing for 2021, though it's probably already too late for that. 

We're also at Tropical Storm Beta in the north Atlantic. It's also going to hit Louisiana - along with Texas. Teddy and Wilfred are also still hanging out in the ocean. Two more storms are likely to form. Peak hurricane season continues until mid-October.

Fall can represent the later years of a person's life. Some people might associate that with dying (they're not wrong). Trees loose their leaves. A lot of animals go into hibernation or die because it gets too cold. The days are short and the nights turn long. These patterns are eerie and foreboding.

But there's another side of fall. 

Fall is the time of the harvest. Where all the hard work of Spring and Summer pay off and there is an abundance of food to share. People want to celebrate with their communities in the Fall with festivities like Halloween and Thanksgiving. Bond fires are frequent and who doesn't love to snuggle up to someone on a cool night with a hot drink to share. 

However, to have a good harvest, the right conditions and hard work need to be done. Luck plays a part of it too. Crops can fail even for the best farmers. But even with bad weather, the community can still prosper if they plan right and are willing to make some hard choices to benefit everyone.

This harvest season hasn't started off the most positive. 

On Friday, the world lost one of the most iconic women of this age. The loss of Ruth Bader Ginsburg is tough. I feel both saddened and fearful for a future without her. She was one of those people who seemed invincible. 

RBG may be gone, but she won't be forgotten. She continues to inspire those who wish to take action. 

The season has only just begun and I find myself dreading it's end. A lot can happen in three short months. A lot can change. 

What we do this fall with have consequences for many more falls to come. Like a farmer who needs to prepare for the next Spring's planting, we have to be ready for what nature has in store for us. If we don't have politicians and leadership that can prepare for more violent storms and wild fires, then more people will be in harms way. If we don't address the social hurts of society, we will grow further divided. 

The harvest has begun, but it is not the time to rest. The future is within reach and our actions now will mold it for better or worse. 

I hope you, my readers are staying safe. 

Until next week. 

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome Back to NoVa

I’m still reeling from all the changes going on in my life right now. Today’s post is gonna be very short - just a quick update really.

It’s been a few week since my last post and in that time a lot of things have changed in my life. I’ve started a new job and relocated to my childhood home of NoVa - Northern Virginia to the non-DMV resident.

Sick of the acronyms yet?

The DMV - as in DC, Maryland, and Virginia - is a lot different from norther New Jersey. Our accents are a lot softer, our roads are a lot wider, and New Jersey lefts aren’t really a thing (I’m not explaining that one).

In many ways I feel like little has changed since I was last in the area. In many other ways, I feel completely out of the loop. DC (only tourists call it Washington) runs everything here and most people have some connection to the city.

Things are much more laid back here, but people are also a lot less likely to tell you exactly what they think. Secrets are the biggest industry in the nation’s capitol - not that I have any. I’m also not really looking forward to the hot and muggy summer months.

 It overall things are fine.

I admit, I miss my friends in New Jersey and my apartment. My new place is nice and a bit bigger than the last, but it’s missing some of the charm of living in a house over a century old. I miss being within spitting distance from a train station. The quiet nights take some getting used to. I miss the mountains and the hiking trails where I saw my first bear.

But I like my new home. I’m hoping to start doing some volunteer work soon - maybe work with animals and plants. There are a lot of nice walking trails and I’m a lot closer to some of my favorite places in the world (the Shenandoah anyone).

I’m back in the DMV. I’m back in NoVa. I hope to not be living out of boxes by the end of the month.

It’s the start of a new adventure in a familiar area, but things have changed - I’ve changed - so it’s not really going home.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please, like, share and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to Stress in Motion

Moving sucks. It’s painful, emotional, expensive, and an all around pain in the butt. My current place is a mess and I’m grumpy about it. I have so many things to do and I’m freaking out on how to do them all.

I wish I had a teleported or time machine to get me through all of this. I can’t wait for it to be April or May when all of this is over. I’m tired of being emotional and stressed.

I’ve heard that moving is one of the biggest stresses that a person can go through. I believe it. It’s up there with getting married, funerals, and having kids. I’ve only ever moved so I can’t speak on the other major stresses in life. I can tell you all that I hate it.

How have I been dealing with this newly stressful situation?

By taking it one day at a time.

That’s all I really can do. I’ve made a list of everything that needs to be done. I’ve spent time with friends and called my family. I’ve started throwing away and donating things that I no longer want or need.

I honestly sometimes wonder why I have the things I do, but that’s not a question I can answer now. I just need to put everything carefully into boxes and figure out how to get my couch out of my apartment (we got it in somehow so we can get it out).

Stress sucks. My muscles tense up and I have a hard time falling a sleep. I pace and can only think of every worst case scenario that could possibly happen - instead of the good things. My mind won’t freaking shut up.

It’ll pass...eventually. Everything will get done...eventually.

This is how these things go.

This is me screaming...

But if anyone ever tells you that it’s easy to pick up and leave a place laugh. I get annoyed when someone says that if there are no jobs near you to move near the jobs. It’s never that simple and it’s  very expensive (especially if the job isn’t helping you out).

Seriously, can someone get to inventing a teleported?

Thats all I have for tonight. I don’t know if I’ll have a new blog post up for you guys until I’ve made it to my new home. So until next time everyone!

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you like hearing from me.

Welcome to the End of a Chapter

I knew it was coming.

I just thought I'd have a little bit more time, but that's not how life goes. Life doesn't give you a clean break when things changing. I can't teleport myself from one place to the next with all my stuff ready to move with me.

After almost six months, I've found a wonderful job opportunity. I'm really excited and it's in a field that I'm very passionate about.

However, it will take me away from the life I've built in Northern New Jersey and taking me back to my home state of Virginia.

I have a lot of feelings about this transition. I'm excited for the job - relieved to finally have a job. I'm happy to be moving closer to the friends and family I left behind in Virginia. I feel ready for the next adventure I'm to go on.

But I'm also sad. I've made some really good friends in New Jersey and they are just as sad as I am that I'm leaving. From my yoga teacher to the people I see every week at the farmer's market. From my two writing groups to my wonderful landlady and her three adorable beagles. I'm going to miss all of them.

I'm going to miss being able to roll out of bed on a Friday morning to catch the train into New York City. I'm going to miss going and seeing a show on a random night of the week because I can always catch the last train home (even if there are tons of drunk kids on it with me). I'm going to miss my favorite hiking spots and the view of the city from Rt 17 South in Ramsey.

I've found myself with a wonderful opportunity and I've decided to take it. I don't know what's exactly is about to happen next, but I've been in this position before.

The first time I moved for my first job, it wasn't a difficult transition. I was about an hour away from my friends and family. The second move from Maryland to New Jersey was a lot harder. I didn't know anyone in New Jersey except for a few coworkers. I cried the entire drive. I burst into tears as soon as the movers showed up at my apartment.

Thankfully, my roommate I lived with that first year in New Jersey was one of the most wonderful people I could have met.

I moved again after a year, but only ten minutes up the way. It wasn't the hardest move and I was excited to have my own place again. My landlady was so nice and the doggies so cute.

Part of me wishes that I could fast-forward through the next few months. Looking back on those first few moves, I remember the emotions that the change caused. There's so much work I have to do, but I can't do it all at once. I still have to take everything one day at a time.

I know that this will all turn out for the best. I just have to get through saying good bye and settling into my new home. I don't want to lose the relationships I've gained, but I know the reality of this type of move.

I'm happy to be going back to Virginia. I'm excited for this job.

I'm sad that this chapter of my life is coming to a close.

I wish I knew more about what the next chapter brings.

Hopefully it's not a cliffhanger.

Welcome to an Accomplished Decade

Between a series of unfortunate events (not related to the book or Netflix mini-series sadly) and some bad timing, I completely neglected to notice that my last blog post marked my 300th entry in Starting Out In Wonderland. 300 topics that I have written about - occasionally repeated. 300 weeks where I hit "publish" and hoped that people enjoyed reading my inner thoughts (or how much I dislike traffic).

One of the many rainbows of Iceland

300 is a big number.

When I started this blog, I didn't know if it would last or not. I thought I'd write some advice to young adults who had just left home. If anyone reads this blog for advice after all these years, the only lessons you might be learning is what not to do in life.

To further add to the significance of my 300th post is the sense of change floating which hovers like a dark cloud over my head as well as the end of a decade. Between my insecurities and seeing people post their decade of accomplishments on social media (*cough Twitter *cough), I want to take a moment to reflect on some of the things I accomplished, for better or worse.

It's probably not going to be a comprehensive list and it's not meant as a place for me to brag. In fact some of the things I accomplished only happened because of my dogged stubbornness, others out of a lack of decisiveness, and a few from sheer dumb luck. There were a lot of tears, a few angry fists shaken at the sky, and a lot of happy moments.

But these are things that have shaped who I am and had a direct influence over since the start of 2010. I hope you read this list and think of your own accomplishments from the decade. Maybe reflect how you've changed as a person.

Because I know I'm not the person who I was in 2010. Heck, I'm not the same person today that I was last week.

So in no particular order:

• I voted for the first time
• I graduated University
• I got my first full time job and moved away from home
• I moved four times in five years (which included moving to and from three different states)
• I changed jobs once
• I was laid off
• I started taking my writing more seriously
• I published my first short story
• I had my first poem accepted for publication
• I fell in love (twice) and fell out of love (also twice)
• I played in my first rugby game
• I broke my first bone
• I made a lot of new friends...and left a few behind
• I attended my first convention (it was Bronycon)
• I cosplayed for the first time
• I was the person of honor at my sister's wedding and even got to wear a suit and bow tie
• I might have accidentally become a goddess
• I sang in the church choir
• I learned how to travel by myself...and probably will never stop
• I went to Iceland, Hong Kong, Oregon, and Washington for the first time
• I finally went back to Japan
• I learned and grew as a person outside of school
• I started a blog, and then another one about food
• I started a webcomic
• I learned how to be an artist...and a writer
• I started taking my mental health as seriously as my physical health
• I wrote my first novel (and promptly hid it from the world)
• I built a butterfly garden
• I learned how to accept myself...which is a lot easier said than done

It might not seem like a long list for a decade of accomplishments, but I think it's a nice list. You, my readers, have been around for much of it (I did start this blog in 2013). I written about my travels, cosplaying, publications, and explorations. I might have mentioned a time or two about the craziness of moving and how to make new friends in a new place. 

It was a fun first convention.

If you're wondering about the goddess thing...it's a joke, I swear, and has to do with one of the writer's groups I attend. 

And looking at this list, I feel a little bit better. I've been in a bit of a slump and it's easy to slip into an over-critical mindset when this happens. Looking over my accomplishments - good, bad, and down right ugly - makes me feel a little less low, as though I can get through this current tough time. 

I hope my list inspires you to reflect on this past decade, but don't compare what I've shared with your accomplishments. We all have different life experiences and circumstances. We all have different things that are important to us. What you've done today, this month, this year, or this decade is your accomplishment. It's awesome because you think it's awesome.

My drawing style has greatly improved since this.

Things are always changing. I'd be surprised if you said you felt the same way today as you did back in 2010. I like to think that everything that happens, that shape us to the person we are today, creates a positive outcome. My life is currently all over the place (I'd like to blame Mercury being in retrograde, but that's just nonsense), but I hope it gets sorted soon.

If you feel that this decade wasn't the best, that's okay too. The 20s are just around the corner and wouldn't it be awesome if we brought back jazz and swing just in time?

Hopefully until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

P.S. always keep duct tape in the glove compartment.

Welcome to a Season in Transition

Fall is my favorite season.

The air is crisp and clean compared to the moisture and humidity of summer. Trees transition from vibrant greens to brilliant reds, yellows, and oranges. The farmers market is full of fresh produce and food has an extra layer of spice.

The weather is constantly changing. One minute it’s cool with a light breeze, perfect for sweaters and blankets. Then it’s back up to the 90s and I’m back in shorts and a tank top. Thunderstorms aren’t quite as dramatic in the fall like they are in summer, unless it’s a major storm. The world seems a little brighter, though that could be the decrease in moisture in the air and the sun’s rays reflecting off the changing leaves.

Time to gather around the bond fire

Much like spring, fall feels too short. It’s supposed to last about three months as all the other seasons are supposed to. It never does.

This fall has started out a lot different than usual.

I remember when I started this blog, I lamented about how weird it was that I wasn’t going back to school like I had every other year since I was 4 or 5. This year, I got laid off and my sister got married. I managed to sell my first short story.

Another fall pass time at school we’re challenging the anti-education protestors.

I’m not sure where I’m going.

I’m not entirely sure where I want to be.

Change is my only certainty.

I named this blog “Starting Out in Wonderland” after one of my favorite books because the adult world felt like entering Alice’s Wonderland. Nonsensical and illogical, but with arbitrary rules I had to follow even if they still don’t make much sense to me.

I start every blog post with “Welcome to...” after the anime “Welcome to the NHK”. I had to watch it in college for one of my classes. It’s not one of my favorite anime series, but it resonated with me. I think it’s because the anime focuses on three people trying to navigate the adult world while struggling with their mental health and personal demons. I should really rewatch it. The light novel and manga the series is based on are a little different, so I can’t comment on them.

There are days where I wish I was still in high school or college and the most stressful things I had to worry about was passing my next test. There are days where I wish it was the future and I was delighted with everything I had accomplished. Content with where life has taken me.

Rarely do I take the time to appreciate the present.

I’m currently sitting in my apartment, rewatching “The Haunting of Hill House” for the third time. Occasionally the wind shifts and light bounces around the walls, highlights of pale yellow and green against a bright blue sky and warm orange sunlight. I try to spot the hidden ghosts in the show between typing out these words.

I dislike uncertainty. Planning for things comes naturally to me. Being idle is not ideal. I need to do something.

So I write and do research until I figure out what to do next.

If you enjoyed this post, or it really pissed you off, please like share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to the Sudden Changes I Probably Needed...

...but didn't really want.

A few years ago, for LGBTQ+ month, I took the time to watch the six hour HBO miniseries "Angels in America" adapted from the play with the same name by Tony Kushner. I knew very little about the play other than a recommendation in one of Lindsay Ellis's YouTube video essays and by watching Kyle Kallgren's YouTube analysis of it.

I immediately fell in love with the 2 part, 6 episode production. If I ever get the opportunity to see the original play on stage, I will take it in a heart beat.

One of my favorite quotes from the play comes at a point where one character, Harper, is being forced to reevaluate her life and figure out what she wants. She ends up having a conversation with an animated mannequin of a pioneer Mormon woman that goes as follows:

 “Harper: In your experience of the world. How do people change? 

Mormon Mother: Well it has something to do with God so it's not very nice.
God splits the skin with a jagged thumbnail from throat to belly and then plunges a huge filthy hand in, he grabs hold of your bloody tubes and they slip to evade his grasp but he squeezes hard, he insists, he pulls and pulls till all your innards are yanked out and the pain! We can't even talk about that. And then he stuffs them back, dirty, tangled and torn. It's up to you to do the stitching.

Harper: And then up you get. And walk around.

Mormon Mother: Just mangled guts pretending.

Harper: That's how people change.”

I was laid off this past week.

It's a little easier to type those words out, now that it's been a few days. When I first got the news, I tried my best to not cry in front of my boss (though I think he knew I was going to), but I couldn't stop all of the tears. I spent the next few days alternating between feeling numb, crying my eyes out, and screaming away my pain.

I knew my current job wasn't going to be forever, I just thought I'd stay on a few more years. I really liked my coworkers and bosses. I liked the work. I wanted things to go a lot differently.

I was content with how my life was going, even if it wasn't perfect.

Tuesday came, and the universe decided I needed a good hard b!tch slap.

Thankfully I'm in a better position than I thought, even if it's been difficult for me to see that through all of my emotions. I have a very loving and supportive family, even if it sometimes feels like they are trying to smother me. And I have some of the most wonderful friends a person could ever ask for.

Everyone is giving me really good advice and assuring me that it's not the end of the world...even if I still somewhat feel it is. I need to process all of my emotions before I can take my next steps.

I have no idea what's going to happen over the next few weeks, let alone the next few months. Well, I do know that my sister needs help with her wedding, so I have that on my agenda.

And I do have some good news to come out of this week. I received my first publication contract. One of my short stories will be appearing in the anthology Hell's Highway. It was wonderful news to come after being laid off.

The Mormon Mother's words on change are graphic, painful, and spot on. My body felt like it was being ripped to pieces on Tuesday.

Today, though I'm still sad and scared about what the future will bring, I'm doing a lot better. I'm more hopeful and positive.

Change is a constant of life. I may be resistant and try to avoid it, but I may have needed it.

Thank you all for reading and if you haven't seen it, please go watch "Angels in America".

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

I might take next week off from writing since I need to dedicate some time to my sister's wedding. So I'll simply say, until next time.

Welcome to a New Year New You

I don't buy it.

I am absolutely certain that a new year will NOT automatically turn me into a new person. There's no magic spell or fantastical event that will change me from the person that I was at 11:59 PM on the 31st of December to a brand new person on 12:00 AM on the 1st of January.

The new year is not only a metaphorical change, but a social marker signifying that a change has happened. Gym and dieting ads are constantly popping about keeping up with your New Year's Resolution.

Instant change doesn't happen - no matter how much I sometimes wish it would.

Though I do think I've changed since the 1st of January 2018. The amount of things that can happen in 365 days is astounding and each event impacts my life in different ways. Whether that change has been for the better or worse is yet to be known (though typically upon reflection I'm more inclined to be annoyed with my younger self).

Change requires commitment and a plan of action. Resolutions are one way people try to establish that things will be different in the upcoming year. I've tried making New Year Resolutions in the past and I've stuck to them or remembered them by the time February rolls around.

Instead of making a resolution, I've desiccated that I'm doing trying a different tactic, one I am less likely to forget. I'm setting goals. Why am I setting goals rather than making resolution?

To put it bluntly, there isn't as much as a perceived pressure on me with setting goals as there is with making a resolution. A resolution bares a connotation that it is going to happen, a goal is more like an idealized destination that requires some sort of journey to get there. I don't necessarily have to meet these goals, but I'm going to have fun trying to meet them.

I have three main, somewhat easy, goals:

1. Read as much as I can - I've always been an avid reader, but lately I've been wanting to branch out into new genres and authors. 
2. Explore New York - I live near one of the greatest cities in the world. I haven't even scratched the surface of all the cool and unusual things I can do. My first adventure - seeing Wicked 
3. Live in the present - this one is going to be a lot harder than it sounds. I have this compulsion to plan things out. I'm always planning on what's going to happen in the future and it can cause me to miss things in the present. That's why I want to focus on mindfulness and being present in my day-to-day activities

Some of the books I plan on reading this year. One I've already finished.

Finally, I have set a reach goal for myself. It's not anything special, nor do I feel any pressure to attain it.

• Reach Goal - Have an adventure worth reading about

What do I mean by that?

I don't know yet, but I hope it's fun.

For many years I have lived under the assumption that I am the author of my life. However, I'm beginning to rethink this idea. 

An author/writer has complete control of the narrative. They are the gods of their creations. They can decide anything and everything from how a character reacts to bad news to the weather on a particular day. The only things I can control are how I react to the situation I am currently in. Ergo, I am not the author of my life at all, just another character on a fantastical journey who doesn't know how, when, or where the story will end.

Which is why if I'm going to have adventures, they might as well be worth reading about.

I hope all of you have had a wonderful holiday season and are ready for 2019.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to the Inciting Incident of Change

Writing the start of a novel is really hard, especially when I'm anxious to write the "really good" parts first. I suppose I could start with the "really good" parts, but then I run into the issue of people not being attached enough to the characters to care about what's happening to them. I can't just start with action, that might leave the readers confused. And characters need to be invested in what's going on around them for readers to become invested.

For example, how often do you walk to your desk to find your phone with a hundred rubber bands around it?

All this was going through my head while trying to start a novel and justify why this one specific character had the main point of view. 

I'm currently trying to get back into the swing of writing this novel, but I admit that it's been hard. For a while I couldn't quite figure out why I'd been struggling, but now I think I do (other than the whole not finding time to sit and write issue - that's something else entirely).

It's supposed to be a horror coming of age story. One where two boys are going to a supposedly cursed high school where they feel oppressed by the administration and their peers are dying in horrific "accidents". There's also a mysterious girl that one of the boys has a crush on, while the other finds her extremely annoying (she really likes the color pink).

A rough picture of what the "love interest" looks like

This story, in theory, should be easy for me to write. I've long since survived high school and coming of age stories are everywhere. Horror has often featured teenagers in the narrative, especially in the campy horror movies that were snuck into middle school sleepover parties.

Despite the vast number of genre examples I can pull from, I also need to balance the cliche with novelty. I need a reason for people to pick my story to read. It has to be genre compliant and just different enough to stand out.

And this balance has to be established right at the beginning.

The inciting incident is the hook that catches the reader and keeps them reading. This usually happens within the first chapter of the novel with a similar incident happening by the end of chapter 3. It's the event that launches the story from "another day in the life of" to "I'm going on an adventure!"

It's when the writer asks, "what's different about today?"

For my story, this happens when the protagonist starts his first day of freshmen year at a "cursed" high school. That small change to my character's world changes his life forever. It's not too dissimilar from the start of other coming of age stories. Mine just happens to include murderous ghosts to go along with the huge pile of homework.

So if you're struggling with the start of your story or novel, be sure to ask yourself what the change to your character's routine is. Maybe they go to a new coffee shop or a person was rude to them at a restaurant. It could be that the sky lit up bright orange in the middle of the night or cat followed them home.

A change in my everyday routine doesn't always lead to a crazy adventure, but in the world of fiction it can be the difference of winning the lottery or ending up in outer space with weird guy in a blue police box.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please, like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to the Change that Wasn’t

I know it’s a weird title. Especially since last week I wrote how change is everywhere and needs to be embraced to reach fullest potential. So, why this title?

I often treat change like a life altering event. Sort of a one time shift in my life and everything will be different. Except that’s not how change works,  nor is that how change should be treated.

How many times have I told myself that by X date I will do Y thing, only for me to forget two weeks down the line and realized I’ve missed my deadline?

Too many to count.

And I bet dolllars to donuts that you guys (my readers) have too. These are the changes we are conscious of. The ones we try to plan for, but rarely have the opportunity to follow through with because life gets in the way. Sometimes I’m disappointed that I didn’t follow up with this plan, while others feel so trivial by the time I remember them.

When I moved to New Jersey, I made a rough sketch of my plan for the next five years. I thought I had the whole thing figured out. I’d take the GRE, find a Masters program (though in what was flexible), and move again to be near one of my parents.

I’m now three years into that five year plan and I’ve done maybe two things that I had listed out. Neither of those two things turned out remotely how I thought they would. In fact, looking back on it, I’ve had so many other changes to manage that I pretty much have to scrap that plan all together.

Change still happened, even if it wasn’t the change I was looking for.

There are quite a few days were I don’t feel like I’ve changed all that much and others where I hardly recognize my current self from how I was a year ago. I don’t notice my changes from day to day, but I occasionally realize that the person I was a year ago would have made a very different choice than the choice I ended up making.

Subconsciously or consciously, change happens. One day, I’m pretty sure I’m going to wake up and wonder why my mid-twenties self ever thought they’d always feel so out of focus.

It’s LGBTQ+ Pride Month in the USA and some people might be thinking of coming out to their friends and family. It might seem like everything from that point on will change, and it might. It’s unfortunate and disheartening that the LGBTQ+ community continues to face prejudice and stigma.  But being true to yourself is even more important and I’ve found that most people are accepting and happy for others who are able embrace who they are.

I can’t help being me no more than a tree can help being a tree.

If you’re in the LGBTQ+ community and need someone to talk to, please feel free to call a hotline such as the Trevor Project (866 488 7386) or reach out to a local support group such as a local GSA (Gay Straight Alliance) chapter.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Welcome to the Wheel of Change

I've been reading an awesome book called Next is Now. The book isn’t about change, but “about The change” that we “live through every day.” Since finishing the first third of the book, I've realized how resistant I am to change, even when I don’t mean to be.

By that I mean, I resist change without even thinking about it. Ignoring change, even when I know I should embrace it, has become a habit.

Which leads me to another book that I just finished: The Power of Habit. It’s another book I highly recommend and one that I think goes well with Next is Now because it discusses why people form habits and how to change them. Between these two books, I’ve slowly beginning to realize why I’m not as change-resilient as I could be.

Change scares me.

Habits are familiar, safe, and don’t require me to think too much about them. Change is new, unfamiliar, and requires a lot of mental power. To embrace change is to be consciously aware that I am doing something out of the norm.

It’s exhausting.

But change isn’t some big event that we one day wake up to. It’s a constant condition of life. Sure, there’s some predictability and familiarity with certain changes. Every year without fail Apple releases a new iPhone with shiny new upgrades and thousands of people are perfectly happy to pay for it.

It’s the change we know that we need to make, but don’t want to that’s really difficult. Like starting a diet to become healthier or investing in a new computer before the current one dies in a blaze of glory. It’s easy to fall into the trap that doing things the old way, that when it fails it fails spectacularly. I’m talking blue-screen-of-death-your-life’s-work-has-just-been-erased spectacularly.

Thankfully we backed everything up on a floppy disk, right?

Ha ha nope. No modern computer uses a floppy disk. Some don’t even have USB slots anymore. Everything is in the “cloud”.

The whole evolution of how we save our computer files drastically changed in less than 20 years. I remember having to use floppy disks freshmen year of high school.

But sometimes change isn’t as simple as to where I store my backup files. It can be really hard and life altering.

Around this time last year, my anxiety had hit an all time high. I was struggling with even the simplest social interactions. I constantly felt like my life was out of my control. Part of me was convinced that I could handle it on my own. I just needed time to sort out my thoughts, connect with friends and family, not screw everything up...oh crap I just did!

The other, more depressed part of me, knew I couldn’t keep living the way I was. I was just going through the motions of life and not really living it.

I prefer not to go into the details of everything that was going on, but I do feel that being honest about them is more liberating than trying to pretend everything is okay. Because I wasn’t okay.

Looking back on everything, I feel really pathetic. I don’t know what exactly I was scared of. It took a lot of support (especially from one of my aunts), but I was finally able to embrace the changes necessary to take care of my mental health.

That’s a drastic example and I hope I learned from the experience not to wait so long to see someone about a health issue. Change is constant and it is everywhere. It’s a fact that I’m always reminded of.

Coincidentally I’ve been seeing the word “change” around a lot lately. It’s been in my horoscope (or as I pronounce it horror-scope) reading almost daily. Embracing change is part of my company’s message with the release of the new book. I’ve also run into it in some of my favorite TV shows and the books I'm reading. The word has been popping up so much, that I'm trying not to take it as a sign.

And more often than not, change is good.

For those of you who don’t know, May is Mental Health Awareness Month. For my last post in May, I wanted to include a little bit about how hard it was for me to admit that I needed to take care of my mental health. Since making the choice to take better care of myself, things have been a lot better. There are still some bad days, but I'm having a lot more good ones. Getting help and taking care of yourself shouldn't be shameful or seen as weak. Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor about finding a specialist to help you.

If you are feeling suicidal, don't hesitate to call, 1-800-273-8255, to speak to someone.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to Rules are Rule are Rules

Spring has officially arrived! Yay! The sun is out longer. Its finally getting warm. And the news is filled with tons of stories about the biggest annual event that takes place this time of year.

I am of course talking about prom. (What were you guys thinking I meant?)

Between over the top "asked to prom" proposals to the never ending controversy over what is appropriate prom attire, I can't seem to escape the high school dance's drama in my news feed. Which is odd, considering my prom was notably uneventful. Oh it was fun, but drama free (at least from my perspective) and I can't remember anyone being turned away because they wore an inappropriate dress.

Heck I don't remember us even having a dress code at all for our prom.

Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment (or extremely susceptible to click bait), but for some reason I love clicking on these stories, skimming the article, and then rolling my eyes when I finally reach the comment section. Because you know what the most common type of comment is on anything regarding kids complaining about their dress code (or just how unfair life is in general)?

"Rules are rules."

I really hate this phrase. Even if I agree with the "rules" being discussed, as soon as I hear/see this argument my inner Mindy (the small Animaniacs* child who always almost kills her loyal "silly puppy", Buttons) surfaces.

Why? No, seriously why? Why are these rules the rules? What is the logic behind them? Why do they exist? Why do I have to follow them? Do they serve any purpose other than to annoy me?

If the answer to any of the above questions is along the lines of "because I said so" or "so as not to distract other people", I am liable to burst out laughing. Neither of these so called explanations have had any effect on me since I was six. They are inadequacy and only serve to annoy me further.

Now some people might respond with "well, that's life" or "tough cookies that's the answer". And again I might burst out laughing. Yeah life's not fair. I am well aware of this fact. Doesn't mean I have to take it lying down. As an adult, I can fight back against unfair rules or protest laws I don't like as much as I want. Why shouldn't we expect kids to as well?

See that's the funny thing about rules (and laws) in general. There doesn't need to be anything fair about them. The sole purpose of rules is to maintain some form of order. We as a society need order to properly function (at least that's what I've heard, I don't know whether it's true or not). Thus we have rules.

In theory, rules should make some sort of logical sense. Why can't I go in the construction zone without a helmet on? Because I might get hurt from a falling object. Why do I need to keep the walkway clear on the train? So that people can easily move around in case of an emergency.

However, like many things, rules don't always age well. Society changes and things progress, but our rules don't. The advent of the Internet has certainly been an interesting example of this phenomena (pretty much on steroids). Our rules and laws aren't keeping up with how quickly the Internet is evolving. Remember Napster back in the early 2000s?

If rules don't make sense or feel outdated, then they should be challenged and changed. There used to be a law in the state of Virginia that bathtubs were forbidden inside the house. In modern times this seems like a silly law, but I'm sure at some point in the state's history it made logical sense. The rule/law needed to change to how bathing was treated by society.

Without rules, we would have chaos and anarchy. Now I much prefer order to chaos (this is just a personal preference), but I can't deny the fact that order can get a little dull at times. Throwing in a little chaos challenges order and can even help to improve it. Too much, however, can cause serious damage.  It's a delicate balancing act. Then there are the people who just want to watch the world burn. Though they too might have a point, it could cause all of humanity to go extinct.

So about that dress code thing. I honestly think most dress codes need to be updated and changed. Fashion is always changing and evolving. Women can wear pants now (believe it or not my university didn't always allow women to wear pants on campus). We no longer have people measuring how long swim suits are at the beach. It is, gasp, okay to show an ankle or two. And it is perfectly acceptable to wear socks with your sandals (I will be laughing at you, but it's not against any rules).

To tell kids to not challenge rules (outdated or otherwise) is a disservice to them. Kids and adults should always question authority figures and the rules they make. Rules can be made that give an advantage to a group of players while causing massive disadvantages to another, more vulnerable group. They should be challenged and removed. Challenging authority and the rules they make is an important part of what makes America great. After all, if the founding father's hadn't challenged the rule of Great Britain, the US might not be the crazy independent country it is now.

As David Bowie once sang (may he rest in peace): "And these children that you spit on as they try to change their worlds are immune to your consultations. They're quite aware of what they're going through."

So the next time you see or hear people protesting rules they think should be changed, don't tell them they should just live with what the powers at be decide. Listen to them, they probably have something important to say.

Unless they want to disenfranchise someone, then you have my permission to laugh in their faces.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me. Now, I'm off to go protest bathtubs being inside houses in Virginia. Clearly they should be back outside with nature.

Until next week.

*If you guys didn't know, Animaniacs  is on Netflix. I have been enjoying rewatching this show. I think some of it has gotten better with age.

Welcome to Passion

Having a passion for something is a wonderful feeling. I personally have a few passions (most fall under the category of story telling) that I try to pursue whenever I get the chance. In some cases, I've even managed to combine passions, such as food and writing to become a food blog.

Cooking for me is fun and relaxing.

 Some people might have only one passion, while others may have a thousand different things that make them want to stand on a soap box and declare how awesome their passions are. Some people enjoy their passions as hobbies like building model airplanes, others turn them into a business.

I think feeling passion for what I am doing is very important. Otherwise, why would I be doing that thing? 

Okay, I'll make an exception to cleaning, since I need to get that done anyway. Then again, having a clean living space makes me feel good, so maybe I do find some sort of passion in cleaning.

I equate passion with strong positive emotions. Being passionate about something should make me feel good, right? That's why I work hard on my hobbies and job. They make me happy and I feel fulfilled.

Shameless plugs are shameless when they are one of my passions...

When I'm making plans for the future, my passions are usually high on the priority list of things that I want to do. I would love to write a novel and get it published, but I have to plan my time wisely to write, do research on the publishing industry, and mentally prepare myself for the massive amount of rejections that are very likely to happen before my dreams become a reality. Since I am a planner by nature, I need to factor all of that in while planning out what I'm going to do each week.

Other people might have a passion for nature. They might try to plan on living in an area with a lot of great hiking locations and outdoor adventure opportunities. People who love dogs might plan on having a place to live that can easily accommodate the fur baby. Someone who loves classic cars might go into mechanics so they can keep their favorites up and running smoothly.

Passions can change over time. I know when I was six, all I wanted to do was go into outer space. I might not have chosen to be an astronaut or astrophysicist, but instead my passion evolved to me enjoying writing science fiction stories (alright fine, it's mostly Transformers fanfiction, but I'm branching out).

Some people might not be able to pursue their passions at the moment or haven't figured out what they are passionate about. An author I recently saw at a speaking event, stated that he always knew he wanted to write a book that he could proudly display on a self. The only problem was he had no idea what that novel should be about. It took him a long time to finally follow up on his passion and today he has a hardcover copy of his book sitting on his shelf.

My passions drive me to keep working hard and enjoy what I am doing. It can be hard to do and might take a long time before a passion is fulfilled, but in the end I think it's all worth it. After all, no one pops out of the ground perfect at what they love. 

I hope everyone keeps working on their passions. I certainly hope I do. 

Also Hufflepuffs are the best!

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me. Until next week.

Welcome to the Evolution of the Princess Factor

Princesses, I can't seem to escape them in popular culture. In almost any high fantasy book or fairy tale I've picked up features at least one princess. Fantasy anime and RPGs love having a secret princess show up somewhere in the plot. YouTubers have analyzed why princesses are hated and Tumblers have argued which one is the best. Not to mention the Disney company has created an empire off of the princess narrative.

There's a lot of princesses out there. Lord of the Rings has Eowyn. The Princess Bride has Buttercup. Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind has, well, Nausicaä. Nintendo still capitalizes on Princess Peach and Princess Zelda, despite them possibly not being princesses. For Zelda it's at least implied that she's the daughter of someone else ruling the kingdom, so I'll give her a pass. As I have never seen a King or Queen of the Mushroom Kingdom, I'm going to have to assume that it's a vanity thing with Peach. The same thing applies to the My Little Pony Princesses in Friendship is Magic.

I grew up in the United States, so I didn't really understand the fascination with princesses (or royalty in general). That's not to say I didn't enjoy stories that featured royalty, I just didn't really understand what all the fuss was about. Then I took a few courses on popular culture and European history and I started to understand why they featured so heavily in American culture. 

Most American children, I assume, are introduced to princesses through Disney movies. I know I was. Snow White, Cinderella, and Princess Aurora make up the "Classic" Disney Princess line up. It has since expanded, mostly thanks to the Disney Renascence, to include Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Pocahontas, Mulan, Tiana, Rapunzel, Merida, Anna, Queen Elsa (despite having a completely different title), and hopefully Moana. That's a lot of princesses in a short period of time and it's not even including the princesses who get ignored by the Disney company (sorry Eilonwy and Kida, but your movies didn't do well enough to include you).

I was at the right age for the Disney movies that came out in the 90s and I still watch a lot of them today. However, I can see where some people might not like the princess movies as much. Or at least think they are the best role models for little girls. After re-watching The Little Mermaid for the millionth time in college, my roommate and I came to the agreement that Ariel and Eric are the dumbest Disney protagonists out there. I've also found myself agreeing more and more with King Triton over the years. Seriously Ariel, you are sixteen, listen to your dad. He just wants what's best for you.

Heck I've started agreeing Zazu in the Lion King. He's really not the buzz kill I remember from when I was a kid. He is just trying to teach Simba and Nala that being an adult requires a level of maturity and responsibility they don't have as kids. It isn't all fun and games. I must be getting old if I'm agreeing with Zazu. 

Since the passing of Carrie Fisher, there's been a growing movement to get Princess Leia canonized as a Disney Princess. As I'm still not sure how monarchies work in the Star Wars universe (for example Queen Padmé Amidala is technically democratically elected, but still has the title queen), I'm not sure if she would actually count as a princess. However, she was the first princess that I was introduced to in popular culture who didn't act like a stereotypical princess. In the first movie she ends up saving Han and Luke while they are trying to save her. In the later movies she's one of the top rebel leaders. Damsel in distress, Leia is not.

Moana is the latest female heroine to be called a Disney Princess (though she hasn't been canonized yet) and I personally think she is the best one to date. Though Moana denies her status in the film, Maui points out that she "wears a dress and has an animal side kick" which, in his opinion, automatically makes her a princess. What makes Moana's story different from her predecessors is that she isn't interested in finding love or seeking adventure which leads to a boyfriend. Her movie is about balancing her responsibilities to her people and accepting who she is.

I could find dozens of other examples of princesses who challenge and defy the stereotypes that I've been exposed to. I can also name dozens of examples of characters who exemplify the princess stereotypes, but that fact doesn't stop me from loving the stories or characters. What's important is that the story is engaging and the characters are interesting. And if those two criteria aren't met, then they're probably not the best written stories to begin with.

The princess narrative has changed a lot since Snow White and it's not just Disney who are making these changes. People want new stories and characters that reflect the modern way of thinking. Women's roles in society have changed. Snow White was the scared young girl lost in the woods (yeah she was 14 in that movie, I'm still a little weirded out by that fact) and the victim of her jealous step mother. Moana is a responsible leader who saved her people. Both are interesting characters who have an engaging story to tell. I doubt the princess character is going to go away anytime soon, especially not in fantasy stories, but we're going to continue to see changes to them. 

You know, the live action Beauty and the Beast is coming out soon and I've heard they're making some small changes to Belle's character. It'll be interesting to see how she will be portrayed after 25 years.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me. Until next week.

Welcome to Holiday Cards

Call me old fashioned, but I love getting snail mail. No, not bills. I mean snail mail from friends and family. There's something about getting home after a long day and finding a letter in my mailbox.

I have a few friends who write me letters (and I write them back). We usually include a quick update on our lives, a few plans for the future, and the latest book we're reading. We still try to stay connected via social media and texting, but I love the feeling of pen to paper.

I like sending holiday cards to my family, especially the family I haven't seen in a while and I know I won't see before the end of the year. I include a quick update about my life. Sometimes I add in a few details about how my family is doing.

As I write these letters I start to realize how much has stayed the same and how much really has changed. Time seems to be slipping more and more away from me as I'm getting older. There are many days where I think that it was only last year that I was still at school, but really it's been nearly four years since I graduated.

I'm not going to lie, I can't wait to see what the future holds, but part of me can't let go of the past. Maybe it's because the adult world is a lot more complicated than young me ever realized. Time always seemed to move so slowly when I was a child. It felt like things would always be as they were. I don't think I knew any better.

"Time waits for no one." I don't remember who said this, but I remember it was in the movie Girl Who Leapt Through Time. The movie is about a young girl who suddenly discovers she can go back in time. Instead of using this power for anything heroic, she uses it to eat the pudding her sister stole from her and avoid awkward conversations with a boy she likes. In the end she realizes that she can't keep leaping through time and has to accept the past and move towards the future.

The past is the past and the future is going to show up sooner rather than later. As the years go on, my list of holiday card recipient is going to change and likely shorter. Nothing in life is preminant, even if I wish it was.

I hope everyone is having a good holiday season so far. Now I need to finish these letters, before I realize it's 2017.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y'all like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to Mischief Night

Happy night before Halloween or All Hallows' Eve otherwise known as Mischief Night.  Back when my mom was a kid (or heck go back to when my grandfather was a kid), this was the night that the kids would play tricks on their neighbors. Stuff like throwing toilet paper in trees were some of the pranks that were pulled. 

Now, not so much and that's probably a good thing. However I have seen a recent trend of people talking about how different Halloween has become over the past few decades or so. In some places, kids no longer trick or treat at all. They instead go to the local mall, a school, or a trunk or treat event (when I was a kid if these were options we'd just do as many as we could in addition to traditional trick or treating).

I'll be honest I was one of those kids who dressed up and went trick or treating until I was about 16 years old (I also looked like I was about 12) and it was always a blast. We'd walk around the neighborhood in group of 5 or 6 kids with an adult not that far behind us. Sometimes people would have amazing decorations up that we'd run through giggling. Other times a neighbor would be hidden near the candy bowl and move to scare us when we least suspected it.

We knew we were never in any real danger, especially with  our parents egging us on to ring the doorbell of the really scary houses. There was one year when I was 7 that I scared a neighbor's kids so badly that they refused to go trick or treating. I was dressed as a vampire and had fake blood dripping down my chin.

Halloween as a kid was the best!

As an adult Halloween can be fun, but it depends on what to do. I've always been excited to pass out candy to trick or treaters, except in all the areas that I lived, there weren't any. Most kids went trick or treating at the above mentioned approved places. I might get some this year, but I don't know for certain.

As an adult, I have the option of going to haunted houses, going out and partying, staying in and watching scary movies, or all three. I've spent most of the season going through my Halloween movie collection.

Haunted Houses are another aspect of Halloween that I think has changed a lot. I remember the first year that Buschgardens hosted Hallowscream. It was really cool, if very crowded. Now every theme park seems to have Halloween attractions at night during October. Then there are the haunted houses, hay rides, and corn mazes that crop up only for this time of year. They can range from the sort of cheesy to the OMG I can't believe I signed a waiver to do this.

I actually don't like haunted houses. I'm not that big of a fan of gory horror movies either, but the campy ones with Vincent Price are always worth a viewing. As much as I like the decorations and atmosphere at Halloween, I'm not into getting the stuffing scared out of me by a guy wielding a chainsaw. I'd rather be outside dressed up as a silly spook begging my neighbors for free candy.

But since it's not socially acceptable for me to go trick or treating anymore, I'm going to enjoy watching old horror movies on Hulu while Elvira gives her snarky commentary.

Stay safe everyone. Have a happy Halloween. And if you guys do celebrate Devil's/Mischief Night, try not to do any actual damage and clean up any small pranks.

Someone smashed the pumpkins :(

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off), please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Cue the evil laughter.

Welcome to School Days Long Gone

Next Monday is Labor Day, that means that school will officially be back in session for students everywhere in the USA. Some schools started already, while others are starting this week or next Tuesday at latest. Most college students have already gone back (with varying degrees of embarrassment because their parents are processing the emotions of their child leaving them). I, however, will be going back to my day job and this week's blog post (like many at the end of August) will focus on me not going back to school.

This is your reminder that winter comes after fall and that it does snow in Southern VA.

My first year after I graduate was weird. Back then, I was used to working all summer and then heading back to school in the middle of August. Instead of heading back, though, I helped my little sibling move into their Freshmen dorm.

It's not as weird now, even with the back to school commercials. No, what I am now confronted with is the fact that my friends and relatives are starting to send their kids to school. I know that some of my friends have gotten married and had children, but I still feel far too immature to have my own little ones at the moment, let alone be married.

I honestly don't think I feel that much different from when I was 15 or 16. It probably doesn't help that I'm still often mistaken as a high school student. No I'm not kidding. Maybe, I've matured a bit (which is important) and am focused on different things than my 16 year old self ever focused on.

My transition from full time student to full time member of the work force, has been a challenging one. Sure I'm still learning and working on projects, but I'm so grateful to no longer have to take tests. Now I just have annual reviews, which I think are as stressful as tests, but happen a lot less frequently. My vacation time is also a lot shorter, but I can go places in the off season.

For 12-16 years, school occupied most of my life and during that time, I couldn't wait to be an adult. I could make my own choices about where to go and what to have for dinner. I could stay up super late and watch anything I wanted to on TV. Back then, I didn't really think about a job, paying bills, or responsibilities part of growing up.

The 30 minute sitcoms that are popular always seemed to show the main characters when they weren't at work. Yeah they would occasionally mention their jobs or have the odd episode that featured their place of work, but most of the time the half hour was focused on their family or social lives. As a kid, I thought that life outside of work was what being a grown up was. I didn't realize how different from an episode of Friends or How I Met Your Mother my life would be.

For the past few years my career has been at the forefront of my thoughts (with a few side trips into relationships, exploring my interests, and plotting to take over the world - patent pending). I think it's a bit natural to feel weird or extremely nostalgic at this time of year. Something that was a huge part of your life is over. Sure going back to school is always an option and I'm sure if I ever did, I'd have another emotional roller coaster ride to go through.

But I'm not going back to school. I'm also not 16 (as I kindly point out to the people who actually think I am - this has happened recently and more than once). I have friends who have gotten married and a few who now have kids. I pay bills, lots and lots of bills. I've even started saving for retirement (which is a really long way away).

I want to wish everyone who is going back to school this year the best of luck. I hope you guys do well and are able to have some fun in between all those tests and studying. Maybe someday I'll get my Masters in [insert subject here], but I have a lot to do before then.

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Until next week!