Welcome to Journaling

Recently, I started taking a MasterClass class on short story writing and one piece of advice was to keep a journal. I really like this idea. Journaling has helped me to privately express myself for years, while also gushing about the different kinds of food I enjoy while traveling. Occasionally I get a kick out of going back and reading these journals.

I have kept a journal on and off since I was a child. When I was in elementary school, my interest in journaling came about because of the Dear America and My America books which were written as a series of diary or journal entries by kids living during a particularly important part of American history. Eventually I started working my way through the Royal Diaries collections (which is where I learned about Lady of Ch’iao Kuo also known as Lady Red Bird and the amazing Angolan princess Nzingha).

As a little kid, I tried to emulate the way the dairies were set up - with recorded conversations, notes from newspapers and letters, and more details than a normal journal writer really records. Needless to say, trying to copy this style was exhausting.

Then I went to Japan.

Prior to that trip I was given this really cool journal to write about my time while traveling. My aunt and father also told me about how my grandmother always kept a travel journal and kept  one on what happened every day. Wanting to be like my grandmother, I made my first attempt at keeping a travel journal.

This turned into a bit of a chore when my aunt realized my penmanship was awful and made me sit at the dining table every opening, in Japan, to practice my writing. It wasn’t the most fun activity for an 11 year old. Years later, while reading one of my grandmother’s journals, I discovered that my aunt also had bad penmanship at my age (it was her only “bad” grade in that report card) and I felt a little better about myself.

However, that first travel journal got me into the habit of keeping a journal anytime I feel like I go on an adventure. Last year, before I went on my second trip to Japan, I reread the journal and noticed two things. One, I really liked sparkly gel pens. Two, I was seriously obsessed with the food. I grew out of the first habit and haven’t lost my love of the second habit at all. Every travel journal I keep has a lengthy passage everyday about what I ate that day.

My college journal had been given to my by one of my aunts as a graduation gift. My roommate could often find me recording my thoughts every night before going to bed and it became a major part of my nightly sleep prep ritual.

Compare this to my high school journal which is filled with stories, bad poetry, some even worse drawings, and the occasional spell (clearly I knew I was a witch in high school). Honestly going through that journal is painful and some days I wish I would burn it off the face of the world, but I can’t seem to let it go.

My journal keeping habits since graduating college has varied greatly and I could go years before writing down my thoughts again. However, given the recent pandemic and quarantine, I’ve found myself writing in my journal more and more. It helps with my anxiety about COVID-19 and social distancing. It allows me to organize my thoughts around events and even record some of my weirder dreams (and boy do I have some weird dreams).

Keeping a journal might be a good idea for some people during these trying times. It doesn’t have to be fancy. I once kept an agenda beside my bed to simply write my general mood for the day. A simple spiral notebook works well or even keeping a digital journal in the notes section on your phone.

If you have kids, helping them to start a journal might help them with their writing skills and allow them a bit of privacy to express themselves while we’re all living out of each other’s pockets (just don’t read your kid’s journal - it’s a deep violation of trust - unless invited to).

In some ways this blog post is like a journal. It’s a place where I write down my thoughts and give my opinion and record what’s going on in the world. I just know that anyone on the internet can read it.

If you’re looking for something to help you through these times, try journaling. I can’t say if it’s for everyone, but I do know it’s helped me. And sometimes I laugh at what my younger self thought was important.

If you enjoyed this post, or it really pissed you off, please like share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to Too Much Screen Time

Every week Apple decides to give me an update on how much my weekly screen time I’ve had and whether or not it’s changed from the previous week. It’s a cheerful little ping that sounds every Sunday morning. Sometimes I want to chuck my phone against a wall.

Between my time spent working, using Zoom or FaceTime to talk to my friends, writing, and reading (Lord this list keeps going on and on), I’m getting a headache from how much time I spend staring at a screen. I can't seem to escape the blue glow of electronic screens.

Most days, I roll over and have to pick up my phone to either hit the large snooze button or fumble my way to the alarm "off" button. Once my phone is in my hands, it's all too easy to start scrolling through Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. I might check my email and see if there's been an update to one of the serial stories I'm following. There might be a YouTube video I want to watch.

My day ends in bed again scrolling through my phone. Partially I do this to make certain that my alarm is actually set, but then it turns into me fighting going to sleep. I scroll and jump apps until I can't see straight. A lot of times I'm answering texts and waiting for the replies.

I am well aware that this is not healthy and I've been trying to fix this problem, but it's easy to fall into bad habits when my only connection to my friends and family is a super computer that fits in my hand.

Too much screen time and lack of actual physical human contact has definitely affected my mood. I feel more tired, I'm having trouble sleeping, and I'm having trouble doing things that I enjoy (like writing).

One would think that as a writer, I might enjoy having a greater ability to sit down and write my novel, short stories, and poetry. One would be wrong. As soon as I get into the mood to write after a day at work, I feel too tired to even open my personal laptop. If I do managed to open my personal laptop, I have a hard time concentrating on creating the story I want to. I think I was more creative when I was working in the office then when I'm working at home.

Also, cutting off my screen time right now (for a weekend, I still have to work) probably isn't the best option for me. It's my only way to contact my friends and family. Dropping off the face of the Earth isn't the best idea for right now (even as a joke).

Today, instead of scrolling through my phone, I picked up a new book I'm reading (The Outlaws of Sherwood by Robin McKinley - a Robin Hood story) and then later started a puzzle. The puzzle is still taking up room on my dining room table. I probably won't finish it for a couple of days.

Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful I live in a world with Internet access and a cell phone to be able to see and speak with my friends and family over great distances and especially in this time of social distancing.

I'm just very excited for the day when I can go over to my friend's house and play a board game (hopefully Betrayal at House on the Hill). I want to go to Sweet Frog without worry. Heck, I want to take a trip to the mountains and write for a weekend. Anything to get me out of this strange blending of days.

We will get through this. I need to remember to take care of myself and take breaks away from my screens. I need to go outside and get some sunshine. I need to remember to call my family and answer my friends' texts.

Honestly, is it any wonder that so many people have turned to Animal Crossing during these times. It gives the illusion of going out and talking to people - sure you're basically an indentured servant to Tom Nook, but at least he doesn't charge interest.

And no, my younger self wouldn't enjoy being stuck inside all the time. Younger me probably would have enjoyed it for about a week before playing through all of my GameCube games (by then I should have reached the bottom of both the mines in Harvest Moon).

I did still have some screen time today. I'm writing this blog post and I have a food blog waiting to be written as well. However, I do feel a little better having taken some time away from my computer and phone.

I hope everyone is doing okay and taking time to look after themselves. A lot is going on and can affect each of us in different ways.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to a Balcony Garden

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about the start of spring and how I had fallen back on one of my favorite hobbies: gardening. In the past two weeks, my little garden has grown a little more...in more ways than one?

I went to one of the few gardening centers still open and picked up some Boston lettuce, tomatoes, lavender, camomile, and bachelor buttons (my favorite are the blue ones. I’m having a hard time stopping myself from buying all the plants and pretty pots, but I just have to remember how much space I have.

I admit, going out and being near people right now is very stressful. I’m much happier surrounded by plants and watching the birds fly around while the squirrels play a game of chicken with the local dogs. Occasion a bumblebee will pass by - I’m glad for that because they’re becoming a rarity and we need them for the plants and flowers.

When I get a free chance, I’m outside squatting down looking into the container with carrots and peas that I’m growing from seeds. I probably look a lot like Mei from My Neighbor Totoro while waiting for signs that the plants are growing.

I knew it would take more than a week, but I’ve finally started seeing little pea shoots and the first thin stems of lemon balm. I’m hoping the carrots are soon to follow. The camomile and bachelor buttons were just planted, so it’ll be a little while yet before I start seeing them come up.

I don’t like to think that there will be a shortage of fresh food, nor do I like to think that that fear is what’s driving my plant choices. However, those thoughts do swim around my mind from time to time. It’s a lot easier plucking a couple of leaves of romaine than going out to the store for a full packet.

I’ve seen other people mention that they’re starting a garden. I hope the practice catches on. Gardening is relaxing. The planting, tending, and harvesting of plants makes me feel closer to nature in a way that I haven’t in a long time - even when I go hiking.

I know gardening isn’t for everyone. First time I killed a plant (it was a rosemary bush), I thought I’d never get another plant again. Then I got a papyrus plant and a spired plant, and I suddenly wanted to grow more.

It’s tough, it rewarding.

My garden is mostly herbs right now. I’m looking forward to having fresh mint tea and adding rosemary to my soups.

One day I hope to have a house with a decent size yard to grow a large garden. It’ll have a lot more vegetables and maybe a fruit tree or two.

That’s likely way in the future.

Until then, I’ve got a small balcony facing north - south would be better, but I take what I can. I’ve got some veggies and a lot of herbs. Soon there’ll be some flowers with cute little bees flitting between them all. I’ll likely have to chase the squirrels away.

I’ll keep y’all updated on the garden... because right now, it’s what I got.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I like hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Welcome to Connection in the Time of COVID-19

Yes, I know this is a play on the famous book title “Love in the Time of Cholera". If you are looking for something to do, why don't you download a copy of the book or order one from your local bookstore.

Shout from the balcony!

I’m a bit of a hermit by nature, but nothing has prepared me for the isolation that comes with social distancing, quarantine, and COVID-19. I’m used to being able to spend sometime at a coffee shop or bookstore, enjoying the atmosphere and talking to my friends who might be around.

Now I can’t even go over to a friend’s house without worrying that I could be spreading a dangerous virus. Grocery shopping along has become an exercise in keeping as far away from other people as possible. The only time I ever leave the house (aside from grocery shopping) is to take a walk so that I don’t go stir crazy.

I may be an introvert, but I still need some form of human contact.

Thank goodness for the Internet and cell phones.

My family and friends are constantly calling, messaging, and video chatting with me. Sometimes it’s so they can catch a break from the other people they are staying safe with. Other times they’re board and just want to say hi. Occasionally, we chat because we’re scared and worried and don’t know how to handle the situation.

I have noticed that the amount of time I spend on social media has increased. That’s not necessarily a good thing, but it makes me feel like I’m part of a larger community, instead of just the same white walls of my apartment. I try to share happy posts - fun videos from YouTube, my latest art project, or pretty things I see on my daily walks.

This is the most unusual time I have ever lived through. The closest my one friend and I can compare this to is growing up in the DMV during the DC sniper. We still went to school, but we couldn’t go outside and hardly anyone went shopping. It was a scary time, much like this.

I don’t even remember how we stayed sane those few months (was it months or week - my memory is a little fuzzy).

The current pandemic is completely different. Part of me has a hard time reconciling the idea that this will one day be taught in history classes in generations to come. It is affecting everyone and people feel powerless against a microscopic virus - myself included.

Aside from the general tension of our daily lives. Some people are struggling with their mental health right now. The lack of social interactions can lead to higher rates of depression and anxiety. The people going through these tough times might have trouble reaching out.

I urge everyone to reach out to your friends and family, heck even your coworkers, and check in with them to see how they are doing. Take some time to chat with someone, either via phone call or video, about anything and everything that isn’t virus related.

We will get through this time, hopefully healthy and whole. Until then, we have to stay as safe as possible and that means staying at home as much as possible.

But thankfully the technology is there for us to keep connected.

Facebook and Google might bury this post (it has COVID-19 in the title), but know I’ll be around writing whatever comes to my mind during these uncertain times.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to Spring 2020

It’s finally spring!

It also might snow in a couple days...thanks climate change.

This year is a lot different than years past. We’re in the midst of a global crisis and mostly confined to indoor activities. Thankfully I can still go for walks in the woods, but going anywhere that might attract a large crowed is a solid “no”. That means I can’t visit the Cherry Blossoms that have just hit peak bloom.

I’ve decided instead to fall back on to one of my favorite hobbies: gardening.

It’s been a while since I’ve been able to have a garden - though I’ve been a plant parent for a few years and have volunteered at the New Jersey Botanical Gardens at Ringwood. Growing up, my parents had cultivated a small garden against the east side of our house. By the time I got to high school, I had taken over the vegetable part of the garden (mom ruled the herbs, while dad always made certain we had his favorite flowers). My favorite thing to grow: green beans. Though I hated eating them, they were super fun to cultivate and I’d give them away to anyone who wanted some.

Once I got to college and started working when I wasn’t studying, I wasn’t able to maintain my part of the garden. After graduation, there was never a right time or location to start a small garden. I was living in apartments and all but one had a patio to put plants outside (sadly the patio was too shady for vegetables). I probably could have started a small garden at my previous apartment, but I was so busy, it never occurred to me.

Recently I moved across several states to a new place and it’s perfect for a small container garden. Add in me mostly staying at home and it’s the right time for me to enjoy one of my old hobbies again. Thankfully my new balcony has a lot of light.

I know it doesn’t seem like a big deal and that a lot of other apartment dwellers might not have the same opportunity, but starting an apartment garden is a great way to have some extra herbs and veggies around. I’m not sure it really saves money, but it does make me feel like I won’t have to constantly run to the store to have some fresh food around.

I recently spoke to one of my cousins currently locked down in San Francisco and they also want to start an apartment garden. Unfortunately, the climate in San Francisco isn’t ideal for the plants they want to grow. My cousin is adapting by looking into getting a greenhouse and working with plants that will do well in the limited environment available.

This is how we’re coping with social distancing, the anxiety of going out, and the scary times we live in.

If you can, I recommend starting a garden. Start small, only a few plants that are fairly easy to cultivate (I find peas and green beans are fairly easy veggies, while mint and rosemary are tough to kill herbs - though I have sadly killed a rosemary plant before). Look into plants that attract pollinators like butterflies and humming birds or provide protection against mosquitoes and flies.

If you can’t start your own garden, that’s okay too. Some areas have volunteer programs (where you can work solo or at least keep a good distance from other people) to help out with gardens. And gardens take a lot of work from planting, to watering, to weeding. Some community gardens work with food banks and help struggling families (a plus at any time).

This is a stressful, anxious, and scary time. Part of me still can’t believe I’m living through it. Gardening is one way for me to focus my energy and keep me sane. It’s not for everyone, but for those of us who enjoy it, it can be a wonderful experience.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off), please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to Modern Thoughts on a Pandemic

One of the first black and white movies I ever watched was Ghost on the Loose. It’s one of the East Side Kids/ Bowery Boys movies (basically a 30s/40s version of the “brat pack” of the 80s). The plot of the movie is about how the Kids want to get a house ready for one of their newly married friends, accidentally go to the wrong house where the Nazis are printing war propaganda (the irony isn’t lost of me), solve the “haunted house” mystery, save the USA from Nazis, and end up quarantined because one of them catches the German Measles at the end of the movie.

I distinctly remember asking my dad and grandfather once the movie was over what it meant to be quarantined. They said it meant that they couldn’t leave the house because they might get other people very sick.

To a child who grew up when the Chicken Pox vaccine was just coming out (I actually did catch the Chicken Pox because the vaccine hadn’t come out just yet), the idea that an illness could cause an entire group of people to be trapped inside (even if they didn’t have the disease) was tough to comprehend. I only ever heard about Measles because my parents would mention how lucky it was we didn’t have to worry about it. I knew about Polio from history books and knowing a nice older lady who had contracted the illness as a child.

Epidemics and pandemics were for the history books. My childhood understanding of the world insisted that doctors could cure anything.

This, of course, isn’t true in the slightest.

It wasn’t until I became interested in zombies (of all things) that my understanding of diseases began to change. The early to mid-2000s were all about the zombies. I read the Zombie Survival Guide, watched all of the zombie movies, and started researching the “what if” situations that might occur if a zombie outbreak did happen. This research lead me down a rabbit hole into the general spread of diseases and then into pandemics. To my adolescent brain, a zombie apocalypse wasn’t that dissimilar to what happened during the Black Death.

Fast forward several years and I’m in college taking a class called Mathematical Biology. It was one of the few biology classes I enjoyed, probably because it was all systems of equations and differential equations, but that’s not the point. There was some discussion of a zombie apocalypse during the class - predator/prey models are much more interesting if zombies are involved, but what really caught my interest was the SIR model or the Susceptibility, Infection, and Recovery model that is used for modeling the spread of highly infectious diseases.

A year later, I’m in my Numerical Analysis class and picking my final project. I chose to attempt replicating the spread and death rate of the 1918 pandemic. This required some manipulation of the model on my part (the most simplistic version of the model doesn’t take into account death rates and instead categorized them as “recovered” - logic being that if you’re dead you no longer have the disease).

I did a ton of research for this project and fell down several more rabbit holes into why certain cities in the US had different death rates (the flattening of the curve model wasn’t something I found, but the number of doctors in different cities because of World War 1 was - more doctors equaled more people living). My model wasn’t perfect, but I learned a lot.

The most interesting thing I learned during that project was just how likely a pandemic actually was. I’ve already lived through Swine Flu, Bird Flu, Ebola, SARS, and a few other potential pandemics, but the one we’re facing now is definitely a taste of what is likely to come in the future.

Don’t get me wrong. COVID-19 is deadly, dangerous, and should be taken seriously.

However, with climate change, over population, and the general nature of viruses - things could be and possibly might get worse. It might not be COVID-19 - though there is still potential for it to mutate a second time like the 1918 pandemic and have a worse mortality rate.

There’s also the human response we have to factor in. Already panic shopping has caused stores to run out of essentials. Schools are closing and people are being told to work from home (if they can). People who are homeless or suffer from food insecurity are going to be hit the hardest and it might not be the disease that hurts them most.

There are reports of people stock piling resources to sell at jacked up prices. Hospitals are concerned about the number of cases they’ll be able to handle. There’s a shortage of face masks and the entire country if Italy is on lockdown.

For people like me - financially secure, healthy, and can easily work from home - this is a minor inconvenience. Even if I were to catch the disease it might not be that bad for me.

But this situation isn’t just about me. There are millions of vulnerable people who are no where near as luck.

Here are some things I ask for people to do (if they are able) during this crisis:

1)  Wash your hands - Soap and water are designed to remove the virus from your skin. Use hand sanitizers in between or if you can’t get to soap.
2) If you feel sick for ANY reason - stay home. It might not be the COVID-19, but no chances should be taken. If you need to see a doctor, call in first. Even if you don’t have the virus, if you are sick your immune system is weakened and you could catch something worse. On the flip side you could also spread your illness to someone else.
3) Don’t panic buy, but if you do please donate some of your abundance to local shelters and food banks.
4) Keep tabs on your family, neighbors, or friends who may not be able to prepare or protect themselves as well. I’ve heard numerous reports of older people being scared to go shopping for fear of catching the disease. If you are healthy - see if you can help out.
5) Not everyone can work from home, please be respectful of people who are required to be present to work. See if you can help them by watching their kids or walking their pets.

Please stay safe everyone. I never imagined that I would live through a pandemic, though I always knew it was possible. Our world is not a me, it is a we.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Welcome Back to NoVa

I’m still reeling from all the changes going on in my life right now. Today’s post is gonna be very short - just a quick update really.

It’s been a few week since my last post and in that time a lot of things have changed in my life. I’ve started a new job and relocated to my childhood home of NoVa - Northern Virginia to the non-DMV resident.

Sick of the acronyms yet?

The DMV - as in DC, Maryland, and Virginia - is a lot different from norther New Jersey. Our accents are a lot softer, our roads are a lot wider, and New Jersey lefts aren’t really a thing (I’m not explaining that one).

In many ways I feel like little has changed since I was last in the area. In many other ways, I feel completely out of the loop. DC (only tourists call it Washington) runs everything here and most people have some connection to the city.

Things are much more laid back here, but people are also a lot less likely to tell you exactly what they think. Secrets are the biggest industry in the nation’s capitol - not that I have any. I’m also not really looking forward to the hot and muggy summer months.

 It overall things are fine.

I admit, I miss my friends in New Jersey and my apartment. My new place is nice and a bit bigger than the last, but it’s missing some of the charm of living in a house over a century old. I miss being within spitting distance from a train station. The quiet nights take some getting used to. I miss the mountains and the hiking trails where I saw my first bear.

But I like my new home. I’m hoping to start doing some volunteer work soon - maybe work with animals and plants. There are a lot of nice walking trails and I’m a lot closer to some of my favorite places in the world (the Shenandoah anyone).

I’m back in the DMV. I’m back in NoVa. I hope to not be living out of boxes by the end of the month.

It’s the start of a new adventure in a familiar area, but things have changed - I’ve changed - so it’s not really going home.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please, like, share and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y’all like hearing from me.

Until next week.