Welcome to the Labor of Medieval Women

It's amazing how the more the world changes and time marches on, somethings stay the exact same. 

Paris Paloma recently released a song called Labour - spelt the British way. In the music video (that you can watch on YouTube), you see Paris laying out a table with food and drink. It appears to be set in a medieval or Game of Thrones type fantasy time period. The gentleman sits and begins to eat, while Paris lights a candle and watches him. She sings her complaints for her situation and fear for what would happen if she had a daughter. 

A little over halfway through the song, Paris gets up to leave the table - plate empty - thinks for a moment, then plops back down and grabs a pomegranate. The way Paris rips that pomegranate to bits, biting and tearing it apart so that the juice drips down her mouth and face like blood.

I could go into all of the beautiful imagery and symbolism in this music video. The verse,

"All day, every day, therapist, mother, maid

Nymph then a virgin, nurse then a servant

Just an appendage, live to attend him

So that he never lifts a finger

24-7, baby machine

So he can live out his picket fence dreams

It's not an act of love if you make her

You make me do too much labour",

is particularly relevant for anyone who has been caught in the many roles that women (in particular) are often forced to take on in a more heteronormative relationship. There's a lot to unpack with the song. 

But I especially like the medieval setting.

Coincidently, I also recently read a book called "The Once and Future Sex: Going Medieval on Women's Roles in Society" by Eleanor Janega. I won an advanced reader copy in a GoodReads giveaway. Though the book had come out in January, I didn't get a chance to read it until now - roughly six months later.

It's an interesting and somewhat entertaining read. There were a few parts where I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the antics of medieval men and their thoughts on women. It didn't help that many of the ideas were playing with had originated in Greece. 

Particularly baffling were the beauty standards women had to live up to. To be beautiful meant you were virtuous and the virtuous didn't need to do anything to maintain their beauty. However, beauty standards in the medieval period were just as unattainable as they are today. Women were often encouraged to confess to their beauty routines during confession.

Oh and those beauty standards were very different from what is considered beautiful today. Modern (at least in the 2010s) favored the hourglass figure, while in the medieval time, it was the pear shape that drove men wild.

There is nothing "biological" about these preferences. They really are just preferences. 

Additionally, prostitution was tolerated because apparently, women needed to have sex.

Oh, men also needed to have sex, but it was the ladies who were never satisfied. Women could even demand a divorce if their husbands didn't give them enough sex. Naturally, this didn't happen very often. 

Most annoying, and most relevant to Paris Paloma's "Labour", was the fact that the women were often simply seen as an extension of their husbands. Yes, there are some notable women who did make a name for themselves (Elenore of Aquitaine is a notable example). However, this was more of an exception rather than a rule. 

Women always worked, whether in the fields or as artisans next to their husbands. Women were responsible for the house holds - especially upper class women who needed to take over a lot of the finances while their husbands were off fighting wars. Women did the cleaning - laundry has always been seen as women's work. Women taught their children and sometimes others. 

What might be considered women's work could become men's work if it proved to be profitable. Women didn't necessarily disappear from the work, but their names were often erased in favor of their husband's. It's not unlike how programming went from being women's work in its infancy (the 1940s-70s) until it became more profitable in the 1980s. Men are now seen as the leaders in the industry that was originally dominated by women.

So yeah, the more things change, the more they stay the same. I'd like to recommend both the song "Labour" and the book "The Once and Future Sex: Going Medieval on Women's Roles in Society". My cousin listened to the audio book and enjoyed that version just as much as I enjoyed the physical book. The song has a lot of great symbolism while the book has a great history and foundation for anyone building a fantasy world based on European medieval times. 

Until next week. 

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y'all like to hear from me.

Welcome to my Halloween Music Playlists

 Because I can't just have one Halloween playlist. 

Though it may not seem like it, there are a lot of really good music that might be considered Halloween music. There are of course the classics like "Monster Mash", the theme to the "Addams Family", and "Grim Grinning Ghosts". 

However, I have a lot of fun finding new songs to listen to every year. 

One of the first playlists I found on YouTube was of nightcore remixes of some pretty spooky songs. If you’re unfamiliar with nightcore music, it’s typically a song that has been sped up and played at a higher pitch so the recorded singer’s voice becomes distorted. The list included "Secret” (the Pretty Little Liars opening theme), “You’re So Creepy”, “Creepy Doll”, “Discord” (which I swear was written by a My Little Pony fan band), and other amazingly creepy songs. There are numerous playlists already set up on YouTube.

Continuing with my exploration of fun Halloween music on YouTube, eventually I found playlists of Halloween music spanning multiple decades. Naturally the 80s list included songs like “Ghostbusters” and “Thriller”.

My personal favorite decades lists are the ones that include music from before the 1940s. Since there are so few surviving recorded songs from that era, the 1910s, 1920s, and 1930s are typically lumped together. These songs are spooky and creepy. Part of it is that the recordings haven’t been cleaned or restored to perfection, so there’s some static and background noise. Plus there’s the whole thing that everyone who recorded the songs are dead. 

So, I’m listening to music about ghosts sung by people who are no longer alive. It ups the creepy factor.

Then there’s the femme fatale cabaret  playlist I stumbled upon. It’s all songs about murder, death, and ladies being devious. The song about serial killers is particularly chilling. The picture of a silent film actress staring into my soul that the uploader picked, is equally off putting.

I love it all.

However, sometimes I don't want any lyrics in the music I'm listening to. I have a few go to artists and movie soundtracks that I like. Nox Arcana is a fairly popular music group that you might have heard at theme parks or festivals that want a spooky edge. Adrian von Zieler is another artist that has a lot of Epic Halloween or Dark Fantasy music play lists that will put anyone in the Halloween writing mood - or if you just need something in the background that won't cause too many distractions. 

As for the movie soundtrack play lists, my favorites include the Silent Hill movie, Halloween, the VVitch, Dead Silence, The Fog, and Suspiria (the original Goblin soundtrack is on point). There's something to be said about a fantastic movie score to put you into the Halloween spirit.

And I can't forget the video game soundtracks. Silent Hill 1, 2, and 3 are all fantastic musical compositions to listen to during this holiday season. I'm also quite fond of the ending themes to all of the Fatal Frame games, but especially "Chuo", "Koe", and "Zero no Chouritsu". I also really like official sound track to Corpse Party (both the game and anime). 

But it's not just these songs that make for a great Halloween playlist. Sometimes I want something more contemporary and hard rock.

One of my play lists includes songs like the amazing "Welcome to the Black Parade", "Helena", "Wrong Side of Heaven", almost everything the band Evanescence has released, and a lot of Breaking Benjamin. I started this play list on Pandora under my "Nightmare Before Christmas". It also mixes in some music from the movie Coraline and Corpse Bride. 

And naturally, I listen to "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" multiple times during the spookiest season.

Now, these are just the songs and music I like to listen to to get me in the Halloween spirit. You guys might want to check some of them out or recommend some of your own favorite play lists. There's a lot of great music out there and I didn't even cover half the independent artists or all of the Disney villain songs I love to listen to at this time of year.

Let me know in the comments if you have any spooky recommendations.

Until next week. 

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off), please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y'all like hearing from me.

Welcome to the Quiet Reflection During Hard Times

 This week I was unfortunately laid off...again. 

It's a tough position to be in, especially now. I'm anxious and a bit scared, but I am thankful that I have a wonderful support system who are willing to help me through this. There are many other people in a similar position as myself who can't say that.

It sucks that this happened twice. It sucks that this time I'm facing the added hurdle that is a pandemic. It all around sucks.

As I am not a person who takes idleness well, I have already hit the ground running taking care of updating my resume, job hunting, and all the applications I need to put in now that my work status has changed. At least this time I know more of what I need to and should do.

My knowledge doesn't make the situation any easier. And it's also not just me this time - I have my evil fluffy kitty Karma to worry about.

My list of things I need to do is long and overwhelming. Just thinking about it leaves me wishing to curl up into a tiny ball under a blanket fort and pretend I'm six instead of an adult. But I'm getting them done one item at a time.

Worrying won't fix my situation, but I also can't be constantly working to "fix" it. I'll burn out or turn into a messy pile of shaky bones if I don't take a break every once in a while.

Last night, I needed to take some time to center myself. I grabbed my watercolors, paint brushes, and some washi tape. I cut one of my special art papers into six Polaroid shaped rectangles. Then, I started to paint.

I don't always know what I'm going to create when I put pencil or brush to paper. Sometimes I get inspiration from the colors I pick, other times its an image I've seen that I want to try to recreate. Last night it was a piece of music going through my head. It's a calm song called "The Sixth Station" by Joe Hisaishi and plays at the start of the final third of the movie Spirited Away.

Though not perfect, I am very happy how it turned out

The calming music gave me inspiration. I hummed along with it as I did my best to bring the images in my mind to life on paper. I bobbed and I swayed and I left my mind picture the beautiful image of Chihiro walking along the train tracks covered in water to catch a train.

I love the movie Spirited Away. Chihiro's character grows a lot during the story. There are a lot of unique characters and intense action scenes. Some moments are silly and the animation is wild. But then there are the times when the film is quiet, contemplative. One of those moments is when "The Sixth Station" plays. 

Chihiro is on her way to visit the witch Zeniba - twin sister to the witch, Yubaba, who runs the bathhouse and turned Chihiro's parents into pigs. The scene is beautiful, quiet, and a little melancholic. Chihiro has no idea if Yubaba is going to eat her parents or not. She's worried and scared for her friend Haku. 

However, Chihiro has grown so much since the start of her adventure and this quiet moment is a reflection on all the hard work she's done. There's a chance things may go wrong, but there's an even bigger chance they'll go right.

And [SPOILERS] things go right for Chihiro. She finds a wonderful ally with Zeniba who gives her the courage and wisdom to overcome her last challenge. 

Through all my trials and tribulations over the last two years, I hope that I'm (metaphorically) on my way to visit Zeniba. Yes, there's still a lot of hard work to do. Zeniba puts Chihiro's friends to work, while she sits and thinks on everything she's learned. Chihiro pulls through and I know I will too.

Being laid off is the worst. It's an emotional roller coaster and it's very easy to be left doubting oneself. Taking a quiet moment to reflect or do something that will help relax away the tension is just as important as doing that hard work. 

Muscles tense? Take a hot bubble bath and give yourself a bubble mustache and beard. Mind going a million miles a minute? Take a walk or do a breathing exercise (especially if you find meditating hard).  Find a moment for yourself.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y'all like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to Expression Without Words

Sometimes words fail me.

Maybe that's weird since I write so much (and occasionally can't stop talking), but it's true. Sometimes it's hard to verbalize what I'm thinking and feeling. It's as though there's a disconnect between my mouth and mind. 

Sometimes it's not words that fail me, just one word. I'll do my best to describe it, but my meaning is nearly always lost in translation. I'm sure it's a problem everyone has experienced. That doesn't stop me from getting frustrated when I can't express what I need or want to. 

Communication is an important part of being human. But when I can't use words, how can I express myself?

When I get hurt, it's easy to tell someone I'm in pain. It's when I'm asked to explain the pain that things get tricky. Is it a burning pain? An ache? Does it feel like I'm being stabbed? Is it emotional pain, but still manifests itself with a sickening physical feeling? 

Maybe I can draw a picture instead of trying to describe something that can't be described? Art is a wonderful means of expression. Things can still get lost in translation and meanings can change over time, but often art is the greatest means of expressing what words fail at. 

The visual medium can express so many different things. I especially love the abstract and expressionism. Paintings like the scream are incredibly stimulating and thought provoking. I can't always verbalize what attracts me to these paintings, but sometimes I think they do a better job expressing my emotions when I put pen to paper. 

Music is another medium I often turn to when I'm having trouble with words. Yes, a lot of music has words in it, but there's a lot more that is just sound. Music is a collection of sound that can exist simply to exist, to tell a story, or to make the listener feel an emotion. 

When was the last time you watched a movie without a soundtrack? Alfred Hitchcock's movie, The Birds,  is incredibly off putting because there's no soundtrack. Music helps convey emotions in movies, especially if the characters on screen aren't speaking. 

There are many days that I wish I were a better artist and musician, but I don't think I was born with the talent and I lack the patience to constantly practice. However there is no denying that art and music are incredibly important mediums for conveying information that I might otherwise struggle to communicate. 

Words aren't always enough. Sometimes I need something else to help me describe what is going on in my head.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to the Sound of Silence

Happy holiday weekend everyone! The kids are heading back to school (if they haven't gone back already), outdoor pools are about to close, and the fashion industry tells us we can no longer wear white. Pumpkin spice has returned to coffee and sweet shops everywhere. In some places the leaves are already starting to change and I'm sitting here watching Hocus Pocus while writing this post.

It's a quiet weekend for me. Which means I have plenty of time to think, overthink, and think some more. Writing in my blog helps me organize my thoughts and try to make heads or tails of the crazy that is my life. This topic has been buzzing around in my mind for a while, but last night, before bed, I was kept up by a single question. What is the sound of silence?

I really like the song, The Sound of Silence, originally sung by Simon and Garfunkel and covered by Disturbed. I like both versions, but there is something truly haunting about the Disturbed version (I might get a little heat for that, but it's my honest opinion and I love rock). I was also inspired to ask this question because during my meditation and yoga practice, I am encouraged to maintain stillness and block out the surrounding noise. This can be particularly difficult in a noisy gym.

But in all seriousness, what does silence sound like? Its hard to wrap my head around. There's the metaphorical sound of silence. Where it is people who are silent for one reason or another on an issue (usually, but not necessarily, out of fear or political). Its one way to interpret the question.

Then there's the literal meaning of the phrase. Can silence have a sound? Isn't silence by definition the a sense of sound? 

Unless I suddenly become deaf or travel to outer space (because Ridley Scott taught us that in space no one can hear you scream), I won't find my answer. I'm sure I could (politely) ask, but would I be able to understand the answer?

Throughout the day, I am bombarded with different sounds. I love working to music or leaving the TV on while I cook and clean. I live across the street from a train station and I don't even notice the trains coming and going anymore. Crickets are constantly chirping as the sun starts to set and the three beagles downstairs make it impossible to sneak out of my own apartment (not that I need to sneak out, but they always announce my comings and goings and are super adorable). 

The amount of sounds I hear throughout the day can be overwhelming. I personally don't like going to concerts and haunted houses because the sounds can be too over stimulating for me. When I do find a quiet space, the noise is still there, but it's not as overwhelming. I am almost able to completely block out all outside noise, especially if I'm meditating.

One of my yoga teachers likes to talk about using sensory deprivation tanks. They showed one on the show Stranger Things to get El to the Upside Down world. My yoga teacher says that they get "visions" while in he tank. There isn't any light in the tank, but the mind will still create visions for them. I wonder if the same thing happens when in absolute silence.

Could the sound of silence be a peaceful mind? A sound that is still there, but still? Could it be phantom Maybe that's why I find this question so vexing. There are so many ways to interpret it. Some are positive, some are negative, and some are just neutral.

So what is the sound of silence?

I have no idea, but I'm sure it's different for everyone.

Welcome To Your Commute

Traffic Is Your New Frienemy 

           It's been a tough week for me, but I figured out how to make my own soup. It was delicious and I might start posting some of my original recipes.