Welcome to Beautiful Destruction

A few years back, I saw a video on Facebook where someone glued crayons to a canvas and then melted them with a hairdryer to create a beautiful rainbow. You guys might have seen this video too, or a variation of it. There were versions with a night sky, people walking in the rain under an umbrella, and several with heart designed. Here's a video if you're curious.

I recently was looking for a new project (*cough way to express myself *cough) and once again stumbled upon the melted crayon art videos. It didn’t look too difficult or expensive. I brought a few boxes of crayons and some canvases and got to work experimenting with what I could do.

And I love it!

If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve likely seen a bunch of the “paintings” I’ve come up with (you can follow me at bartholomewalexandra). Each one is unique. All I do is pick the colors and control the heat and airflow on the hairdryer. Sometimes I draw images as the crayon melts, but I don’t always control where the wax goes.

I make beautiful creations out of the destruction of another object.

And there is something seriously satisfying about doing that. It’s like watching an explosion during a movie, there’s a rush watching the destruction take place. It might make a mess, but it also allows for new creation.

I love destruction. Fireworks, explosions, knocking down a block tower, or watching as a wave swallows a sandcastle. It’s beautiful in its own way.

But destruction is also dangerous.

I don’t like destruction if it’s going to harm someone physically, mentally, and/or emotionally. I don’t want to watch as someone lose everything in a natural disaster. I might like seeing a volcano erupt, but not at the expense of someone’s life.

Maybe it’s a morbid fascination. Destruction is beautiful and dangerous. I feel a rush of joy and a flicker of sadness. It’s the beginning and ending of a story. All of which is part of a natural order.

Even the known universe started with a bang.

Beauty is subjective at its core. My love affair with destruction in order to create is my own. I feel good when I’ve managed to make something beautiful after spending an hour or so melting crayons, especially when I’m having a bad spell.

And if I don’t love what I do, there’s no point in me doing it.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me. Also if you see any art you like here or on Instagram, please let me know.

Until next week.

Welcome to Being Heard

"This is a revolution, dammit! We're going to have to offend SOMEbody!" (John Adams, 1776: The Musical).

Before I begin this post, I wanted to let everyone know that some readers will not like what I have to say. I'm okay with that. I realize that when I choose to express an opinion, especially a controversial one, that there will be consequences that I will have to face. However, I feel strongly that I need to express my view point.

I have a blog. It's a place where I can express myself and people can choose to read or ignore my inner thoughts on random things as they please (though I am happy that people read the blog). No one can stop me from posting if I want to write something...at least not in the United States.

The modern world has created many different avenues for getting messages heard, but it used to not be so instantaneous. During the Revolutionary War, messages traveled a lot slower. Most people would gather in the town square to hear someone read out loud the latest news and proclamations. It was how Thomas Paine promoted his work "Common Sense" (you can see reenactments of this in Colonial Williamsburg).

Though we have many ways of sending a message with our modern technology, it can sometimes feel like we are shouting in a room that is already so full of noise, that our voice is drowned out and lost in the void.

Can you hear me now?

Everyone has a message. Everyone has something to say. From the mundane to the radical. From the asinine to the truly profound. Arguing with some faceless troll online is pointless, yet people continue to do so because they feel strongly about the subject (just look at the comment section under any political article posted by George Takei).

Social media is like a tossed salad. There are a lot of different toppings that you can choose to toss out. If you don't like what someone has to say, you can block them. If someone is harassing you, you can report them and they might lose their account (admittedly to varying degrees of success).

I had one nasty troll sending me messages on Facebook about my blog. You bet I reported and blocked them. There wasn't a point trying to engage with someone who obviously wanted to make me feel bad about something I enjoyed doing.

There are other, more powerful ways to send a message that can be promoted by social media. Holding marches in cities, protesting in the street, creating art for everyone to see, kneeling at a football game, and many other public demonstrations get people's attention. Yes, eventually they will end up on social media, but this isn't just a passive click to show I like and support something. This is taking action in a way that is harder to ignore, harder to block out.

When I was still in college, there was a man who liked to stand outside of one of the big science buildings. He would hold up a sign and shout at all of us all the different reasons why we were going to hell and that we needed to renounce our wicked ways (there were about 10 or 12 reasons why I was going to hell according to this guy). He was annoying and I completely disagreed with his message, but occasionally one of the smart-mouthed biology or psychology students would start shouting back at this guy. They would argue and the students would get a good laugh at the expense of Mr. Ultra-Religious.

[Insert credit where credit is due here]

We never told this guy to leave. We never had him removed from campus by police or chased him away. He was annoying sure and I highly doubt anyone on campus liked him. He was peacefully protesting our "heathen ways" in a space that wasn't really his to begin with, but we didn't have a right to silence his voice.

This past week, there was a lot of attention being given to the fact that many players in the NFL chose to take a knee during the national anthem. Most people I saw online supported the NFL players right to protest, but some people didn't. Some people thought that the football players should just play football and not express their opinion on a subject that they feel so incredibly passionate about that they want everyone who watches their games to know.

I disagree. Kneeling during the national anthem is a respectful and peaceful protest and the NFL players have a right to express their thoughts. Their message is that there are problems in our country that need to be addressed and fixed.

No one has the right to silence anyone in this country. That's not saying that people have to listen to the message or agree with it. I have a right to express my thoughts and feelings, no matter how mundane, but no one has to listen to me. It also isn't true that I will be free from consistences by voicing my opinion or taking an action on something, especially something that is very controversial.

So don't tell me to shut up and sit down. Don't be patronizing. These tactics won't work. They'll just make me angry and louder. Instead, maybe listen to what I have to say, try to engage me in conversation, and show some empathy.

Oh, and about that controversial statement that I mentioned I would be making at the beginning of this post:

"Mean Girls is overrated."

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome to Expression Without Words

Sometimes words fail me.

Maybe that's weird since I write so much (and occasionally can't stop talking), but it's true. Sometimes it's hard to verbalize what I'm thinking and feeling. It's as though there's a disconnect between my mouth and mind. 

Sometimes it's not words that fail me, just one word. I'll do my best to describe it, but my meaning is nearly always lost in translation. I'm sure it's a problem everyone has experienced. That doesn't stop me from getting frustrated when I can't express what I need or want to. 

Communication is an important part of being human. But when I can't use words, how can I express myself?

When I get hurt, it's easy to tell someone I'm in pain. It's when I'm asked to explain the pain that things get tricky. Is it a burning pain? An ache? Does it feel like I'm being stabbed? Is it emotional pain, but still manifests itself with a sickening physical feeling? 

Maybe I can draw a picture instead of trying to describe something that can't be described? Art is a wonderful means of expression. Things can still get lost in translation and meanings can change over time, but often art is the greatest means of expressing what words fail at. 

The visual medium can express so many different things. I especially love the abstract and expressionism. Paintings like the scream are incredibly stimulating and thought provoking. I can't always verbalize what attracts me to these paintings, but sometimes I think they do a better job expressing my emotions when I put pen to paper. 

Music is another medium I often turn to when I'm having trouble with words. Yes, a lot of music has words in it, but there's a lot more that is just sound. Music is a collection of sound that can exist simply to exist, to tell a story, or to make the listener feel an emotion. 

When was the last time you watched a movie without a soundtrack? Alfred Hitchcock's movie, The Birds,  is incredibly off putting because there's no soundtrack. Music helps convey emotions in movies, especially if the characters on screen aren't speaking. 

There are many days that I wish I were a better artist and musician, but I don't think I was born with the talent and I lack the patience to constantly practice. However there is no denying that art and music are incredibly important mediums for conveying information that I might otherwise struggle to communicate. 

Words aren't always enough. Sometimes I need something else to help me describe what is going on in my head.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.

Welcome To Open Letters

Or My Generation's Form of Protest

 

To post or not to post? That is the question.

If you've been paying attention to the Internet lately, or the Internet's version of new, you might have stumbled across a story about an employee at Yelp who wrote an open letter to her CEO. In this open letter she talks about how she can barely afford to live on the income she is making (the full letter can be read here).

Now, I'm not saying she has a valid argument, nor am I saying that she made the best choices. In fact I don't want to make judgements on her choices. They were her choices to make and she's definitely learned a lesson since making them.

No, I'm here to talk about the new frenzy that this caused.

The first news story I came across that alerted me to this event, that doesn't even really matter in the long run, was a story about a Yelp employee getting fired because of her open letter to the CEO. Yep, that's right. This open letter got the author fired from her job. You can read that story here.

So of course because the writer of this open letter was fired and social media allows for anyone with Internet access to share their opinion (myself included), this lead to several more open letters to the writer of the initial open letter. As well as one or two letters to the open letters of the respondents. Oh and the CEO of Yelp gave a statement (one of them via Twitter) on all of the media hype. This lead to even more media coverage. It got to the point where one of  my coworkers who is from the X-generation, reminded all of us Millennials that if you have a problem at work to speak with your supervisor and don't write stuff online where anyone can find it and see it. This is partially why I write under a pseudonym for all of my other online content.

Again, I'm not saying the actions that were taken were right or wrong. I'm just bringing awareness to the stories the media deems worthy of reporting on.

Because weather you think open letters are silly, being over used, or an important platform, they are a way for people to express themselves to a larger audience. Honestly this blog could be considered an open letter, if I chose to include "Dear [insert person here]" before every post.

And yes, I can already hear many people of the older generation going "back in my day...". Yeah, I get it, in the bygone era of yesteryear times were harder and no one cared about your feelings, so we (the younger generation) should just suck it up now. My response to you is: that's not healthy. Sucking it up, pretending you aren't angry, or sad, or any other negative emotion is not healthy.

People need to express themselves. If for any reason than to process the emotions they are feeling. People need to validate the emotions they are going through. They need someone to listen and help them understand that what they are feeling is okay to feel. Unfortunately people have started sharing these feelings on the Internet, which is open for everyone to agree, disagree, or ridicule them. And the media does what it always has done and turns everything into a circus. 

Open letters can be a great tool. I've read several open letters that were featured on one news site or other about many different issues. Many of them are on the dress codes or treating young children with disabilities with respect. Some are about protests and others are about giving thanks. They are a form of speech that allow everyday people to reach a larger audience.

How most of the world sees my generation.

The country I've grown up in prides itself on the first amendment right of freedom of speech. With the help of the Internet, freedom of speech has grown. People are free to express themselves and reach out to a wider audience. Awareness of events, protests, and yes even the crazy things cats do is right at our finger tips.

However there is one minor detail about this freedom that people seem to forget. The first amendment only protects someone from being persecuted by the government. It does not protect someone from any other consequences that might happen because of what was written. As our first open letter writer found out when she was fired for what she wrote.

That being said, don't let this cautionary tale stop you from speaking up about something you feel passionate about. If no one spoke up about what they feel passionate about, nothing will ever change. Believe it or not, change is important.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you guys like hearing from me.