Welcome to a Hopeful Future

This will be my last post until 2020. The 2010s have been a whirl wind of growth and change. I’ve already written about what I’ve accomplished since the start of the decade and I know I’m definitely not the same person I was on January 1st 2010.

Though sometimes I wish I were still that young adult just trying to figure out College and what it meant to be a “grown up”. My memories and feelings of that time are happy and hopeful. I wish I could take what I know today and go back to that young version of me.

But that’s not possible. The past is the past while the future remains undefined.

I get wrapped up thinking about the past when I feel like this. I wrote a slightly different post for today, showed it to my cousin, and she said that I sounded very melancholy about everything. I admit, I have been feeling melancholic. There’s a lot going on in the world and little seems good. I’m disappointed and feel let down by things beyond my control. I’m even having a hard time feeling comfort from some of my favorite escapist fantasies.

I don’t want to be stuck in melancholy for too much longer. I know that these feelings happen to me around this time of year. The sun is at its furthest from the northern hemisphere and it’s way too cold to spend much time outside. I struggle to get into the festive mood.

 It despite the darkness, I know that the days will start getting longer again.

Yesterday was I celebrated Yule, or the winter solstice. It’s officially winter and the start of a new season. Hanukkah starts at sundown. Christmas is on Wednesday. Kwanza starts Thursday. It’s a time for endings and new beginnings.

2020 is a special year. It’s not just the start of a new year, a new decade. The Chinese zodiac resets itself this year and will be the first animal once again, The Year of The Rat. It represents a new day, a new beginning.

Despite all the signs pointing to new beginnings, I still feel like I’m being tangled up by a past I want to leave behind. Social media isn’t helping. Every day Facebook shows me a “memory” or an old post from years ago. Most of these reminders are of happy moments in my life and I start to feel nostalgic for a time that never really existed. Twitter is a cesspool of debate and anger over fandoms and franchises that are decades old. Too much fan service. Too much disappointment. Too many bitter words that taint precious memories.

Is this what it means to be an adult? Will I always feel a constant longing to relive the past, while at the same theme anxious for a better future? Will I keep having the present reality  dissolve my happy childhood memories of the things I loved?

Probably. Other people express these feelings one way or another. There are entire TV shows and movies about this subject.

I just don’t want to be consumed by the feelings.

2020 is a chance for me to take all my past experiences and apply them to something new. I know I won’t feel the way I do all the time, but these feelings won’t disappear for good either. To quote one of my favorite Christmas stories: “I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all  Three shall strive within me.”

If I want a better future, I have to build it from what I’ve learned from the past, while also acknowledging how I’m doing in the present.

Onward to 2020. May it be a wonderful year, a wonderful decade, and a wonderful new beginning.

Also let’s bring back Jazz!

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you like hearing from me.

Until the new year!

Welcome to Cake Pops: The Story of a Hot Mess

I have to give serious props to bakers, especially the ones who go on TV and compete in timed competitions. They make the art of baking and decorating look easy.

I'm here to tell you that they aren't. Not in the slightest.

These turned out the prettiest...until they fell over.

For a couple of holiday parties that I was invited to, I decided to make cake pops. I've sort of made them before, but minus the pop stick and sprinkles. Thus, I wanted to try making them again (with all the trimmings) and feature them in my food blog (it's under a different name and website, but click here) while pairing them with that "special edition" cinnamon coke.

I was not prepared.

Baking the cakes went smoothly, it's when I tried to stick them on the pop sticks and add the chocolate coating that I started running into serious problems. Either the cake pops didn't want to stay on the pop stick, they dangerously leaned to one side in the display I had created, or everything just went all over the place. I probably ended up with more chocolate on me than on the cake pops.

If no one has ever told you, making cake pops is a long process. You’ve got to bake the cake, then add some frosting, let them harden in the fridge or freezer (your mileage on this step may vary), put them on pop sticks, add your chocolate (it’s messy), and finally the sprinkles. Then you’ve got to hope to the universe that they don’t fall over in your display. Oh yes, they will fall. This whole thing took me two days to do (mostly because of trial and error). It was a long two days.

Early yesterday, I wrote on Facebook that I thought that making cake pops would be the end of me - mainly because dipping each pop into chocolate has been the bane of my existence. One of my cousins pointed out that the best way to do this was to drizzle the chocolate onto the cake pops instead. So I ran out to pick up some Styrofoam (not something I like buying, but it worked) to hold the cake pops up and drizzled a ton of chocolate on top of the few remaining un-decorated pops. Candy and chocolate still went flying everywhere.

Other people commented on my Facebook post either to give suggestions or to agree with my frustration. Some of the comments were pretty funny.

It was frustrating, taking a lot longer than I thought it would, and turned out hilarious. If I eat another cake pop before next winter, it'll be too soon. I will say they taste really good, but in the looks department, I've seen prettier fails on the Nailed It subreddit. I might have even baked one of the eggs instead of properly adding it into the cake.

I honestly had to laugh. The whole thing felt like an allegory to my current life situation. It's not pretty, has lots of problems, but there are still reasons to laugh and smile. I think a lot of us feel like we should have everything put together by our mid to late twenties. We won’t and I certainly don’t.

Two days of working on these cake pops and at least they taste good, but my kitchen is a disaster zone and I'm not looking forward to cleaning it up. Thankfully they made it to their destinations in one piece. I hope the same happens to me once I make my next big decision.

I also might be on the verge of hysterically crying. The sheer absurdity of making these cake pop has broken my brain for a few days. And why try challenging myself this way? What's the point? Half of the cake pops ended up on the floor anyway.

Maybe it was because I saw a few pictures online, read a few different recipes, and wanted to make something just as pretty. It looked easy. They looked yummy. It looked fun.

Well, one and a half out of three ain't bad.

This attempt at cake pops might not have turned out my best, but that's how these things go sometimes. I'll keep trying different ways to make them and maybe one day I'll get the technique down right. I’ll hopefully not make as much of a mess either.

Just like in life.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off), please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope y'all like hearing from me.

Until next week.

Welcome to Scrooge and the Grinch

We’re a week into the “official” holiday season. I’ve pulled out the Christmas decorations and movies. Christmas music rings throughout all the stores I go shopping in. I’m being asked to write a Christmas list.

I feel for the people who don’t celebrate Christmas. This time of year must be particularly annoying.

Which brings me to today’s topic. The novella A Christmas Carol and the short story How the Grinch Stole Christmas are undeniably classic Christmas stories about two characters who don’t celebrate Christmas being convinced to participate in the season.

I watch this version every year.

Granted it’s assumed that everyone in these stories is either Christian or live in a world where Christmas is a nondenominational holiday with nary a baby Jesus in sight. The characters are aware of this through cultural osmosis.  It to mention that the morals of these stories have little if anything to do with religion.

A Christmas Carol is a social critique on how the inequalities of the season (seriously Dickens goes on a few rants here and there - mostly during the Christmas Present Ghost’s parts). The Grinch has a message of forgiveness, love, and not being materialistic. At least the original short story and cartoon do, the live-action movie kind of does, and I have no comment on the latest cartoon.

One of the best adaptations.

I haven’t seen the latest cartoon version of The Grinch, ergo I have no opinion on it. I do, however, have a lot of thoughts on the live-action movie. They made a lot of changes to the story in the live-action movie to make it a feature film. The Whos are extremely materialistic and, though they have the Christmas joy, they don’t really have the same spirit that the original cartoon and book Whos do. The live-action movie even gives the Grinch a back story about why he hates Christmas (originally he’s just a mean spirit who hates everything nice and joyful).

And it’s in these changes that I see a bit of a resemblance to A Christmas Carol. You might be wondering how I came to this observation. Well, there are a few key similarities. There’s a lot more social commentary in the Grinch’s story, be with how The Whos are obsessed with materialism and what it means to be kind to those who are a little different from everyone else. On top of that, the Grinch’s backstory is centered around him being bullied and an outcast with the worst incident happening around Christmas. The Grinch seems to hate Christmas because it is the epitome of every horrible thing The Whos ever did to him.

This speech sums up a lot of The Grinch’s feelings.

Similarly, it seems like every horrible thing that happened in Scrooge’s life happened around Christmas. His father would leave him at school every year, until one Christmas where his sister comes to get him and then he’s shipped off right away to start working. His fiancé broke up with him on Christmas. His best friend (I guess Marley is his best friend) died on Christmas. It is also implied that his beloved sister also died around Christmas and since her son is so similar to her that it’s hard for Scrooge to be around him, despite the nephew inviting him to Christmas dinner every year.

Christmas represents the worst times of both Scrooge and the live-action movie Grinch’s lives. It’s no wonder they hate the holiday so much. Everyone wants them to be happy and cheerful and they don’t want to relive their unhappiness. It’s not okay to force someone to feel happy no matter what season it is.

However, feeling unhappiness and making people suffer because of that feeling are two different things. Scrooge and the Grinch take out their anger and frustration on innocent people, which is not okay.

These two characters deserve to have some form of therapy.

And in some ways, they get that therapy...sort of.

For Scrooge, the three spirits are there to show him that though his feelings are justified, his actions aren’t. The Ghost of Christmas Past shows him both good and bad memories, with one of his happiest as an apprentice. The Ghost of Christmas Present shows him that other people are experiencing both good and bad moments on Christmas, ending with a family eating stolen potatoes worrying they might end up in separated in a workhouse. The Ghost of Christmas Future shows the consequences of Scrooge taking out his anger and frustration on other people. It’s not a perfect representation of someone getting the mental health help they need, but the story was written in the 1800s.

The Grinch in the live-action movie has Cindy Lou Who, who is also experiencing some holiday depression. She thinks everything will be “fixed” if she helps the Grinch. It’s a little misguided and she probably shouldn’t be forcing Christmas on the Grinch (she doesn’t really, only invites him to an event that he can say “no” to and tries to see him on Christmas), but because of her actions, the Whos remember the true meaning of Christmas and the Grinch starts his own healing process. Again this isn’t a perfect story about helping someone overcome their past trauma, but it has a good message.

Not everyone celebrates Christmas and not everyone wants to. The messages of A Christmas Carol and How the Grinch Stole Christmas aren’t about forcing people to celebrate a holiday, their about understanding that your actions have consequences and that it’s not okay to take your anger/sadness/depression out on other people.

So if you know someone who either doesn’t celebrate Christmas or is just done with the forced holiday cheer, please don’t force it on them. Extend a hand or an invitation, but don’t show up with a tree and ugly sweater.

As for those of us who find it hard to feel the happiness and joy this holiday season. It’s okay to feel that unhappiness. Humans can’t be happy all the time. But please don’t take it out on other people.

Until next week.

If you enjoyed this post (or it really pissed you off) please like, share, and/or leave a comment. I love hearing from my readers and I hope you like hearing from me.